In this episode, I talk about how you can be kind to yourself. You are being so mean to yourself right now? And I want you to think about something. Kindness is everything in our life. Do something respectable, and give yourself that moment to...
See show notes at: https://www.thinkunbrokenpodcast.com/e190-be-kind-to-yourself-trauma-healing-podcast/#show-notes
In this episode, I talk about how you can be kind to yourself.
You are being so mean to yourself right now? And I want you to think about something. Kindness is everything in our life. Do something respectable, and give yourself that moment to appreciate it, but I believe you can have the best life, the best relationship, the best career, whatever that means for you, as long as you are the one to choose what that means and choose to be kind to yourself.
Are you fully showing up for yourself?
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You are being so mean to yourself right now.
And I want you to think about something.
You see, kindness is everything in our life, like, believe it or not.
And I know that there's hard days and I know that there's days where maybe we're not as kind as we could be but I want you to think about what I'm about to say.
Right now, you are saying things to yourself that if you said to me or someone on the street, you might get punched in the face for and you're expecting yourself to be successful, hmm, the probably doesn't make that much sense.
Now, look at it from this perspective it makes sense. When you come from a traumatic background in society, your parents, your teachers, your peers, your own family and said, you're not good enough, you're not strong enough, you're not capable enough then you're going to start to repeat that, and that becomes your nomenclature for how you talk to yourself. Now, what you have to understand about that is when you are talking to yourself like that, when you're being so incredibly rude and unkind to yourself you automatically are limiting the success that you could potentially have in your life. And what I mean by that, think about this, if you dash your dreams, if you destroy yourself before you even get to the starting line, do you think that you'll cross the finish line? Probably not. You may not even start the race, you may quit in the middle of it, but you're probably not going to finish.
You see, kindness matter so much and people talk about mindset all the time and personal development and trauma and the whole nine. But nobody ever tells you what it really means.
So, I'm going to tell you what it really means…
Mindset is this – what you think becomes what you speak, what you speak become your action and your actions, become your reality.
And so that means that every single thing that comes to your head matters. And if you're operating through a space of being destructive for yourself, that's going to resonate and reflect into your reality, right? Because what you're thinking is becoming your action, you're going to act like someone on a destructive path on a self-sabotaging path, right? And that will become your reality but if you're kind to yourself.
This is one of the first thing, I always teach my clients. You take a pen and a piece of paper and you write this down.
I am the kind of person who is kind to myself.
I am the kind of person who is kind to myself.
Why does this matter? Because when you are operating through a space of kindness, in the moments of life, that are difficult where your hard, where it's frustrated, were you don't feel like you can continue to go on to the next thing. What will happen is you'll ask yourself. What would a kind person do for themselves right now? Would they show up? Would they go the extra 5%? When they get up early? Would they make their bed? Would they clean their room? When they do the dishes? Where they go to the gym with the eat the healthy food? Would they stop smoking? Would they leave the relationship with they travel the world?Would they write the book? Where they start the podcast? When they do the thing that they need to do to make their life different? And if you're operating through the scope of kindness, the answer is going to be, YES.
And you're going to stop limiting yourself and you'll start taking action that propel you forward to having the life that you want to have. You have the ability right now today to have the life that you want to have. No, I'm not saying you're going to get it today, like that's improbable but you can start the path, you can take that first step and see you belittle yourself, you beat yourself up, you tear yourself apart, but I'm going to challenge you to go and stand in the bathroom in front of the mirror and look at yourself in the eyes and in that moment say to yourself.
I am good enough.
I am strong enough.
I am capable enough.
You are beautiful as you are.
You are amazing as you are.
You are incredible as you are.
But you have to own that shit, you have to own it.
So you've taught to be silent, you've been taught to sit in the back of the room, you've been taught children, are to be seen and not heard, you've been taught to turn yourself off as preservation, but guess what? You're not a child anymore.
And one of the most beautiful things that you can do in this journey as own, who the fuck you are today in this moment on your eyes and your ears, and your smile, and your body, in your heart and all the things that make you who you are.
Own your cork in your kinks and your fun and you're weird and your dorky and your nerdy and your extravagant in your success, in your power, and your beauty and your hope own that shit, because I'm gonna tell you right now, if you don't, nobody else is, you've probably heard me say this before, but if you don't believe in yourself, then who will.
And look, I understand humility, I understand the ego, I understand being humble, but I also understand taking ownership of how incredible you are, how powerful you are, how graceful you are, how amazing you are, every single day and that starts with kindness.
You want to get they're probably listening to us right now like Michael that's bullshit, I don't resonate, I don't connect, this doesn't make sense to me, how is this even possible? I don't get it.
It starts with one simple task… You understand that mindset is everything and an understanding that mindset is everything, you understand the most important part of all of this. What you think becomes what you speak, what you speak, become your actions and your action, become your reality.
As you take that fucking pen and a piece of paper and you write it down. I am the kind of person whose kind to myself and you repeat this to yourself, ad nauseam, until you convince yourself that it is true. It might take you a week or a month, or a year or a decade, I don't care, doesn't matter, but you keep doing it because every time you do, you reinforce the new narrative erasing, the old narrative that was given to you embedded in you, meshed in you, groomed into you and grained into you, that's a bunch of bullshit.
Everybody, always told you, you weren't going to be shit, well, guess what? That isn't true, it doesn't have to be true and it will not be true as long as you choose to show up for yourself today. And kindness, and power, and grace, and love, and it's difficult, I'm been there, trust me. You don't get the 350 pounds, smoking two packs a day, drinking yourself to sleep and destroying your life because your kind to yourself. I promise you, you don't but what I can promise you in addition to that is that you can have anything that you want in your life, anything that you deserve, anything that you're willing to tolerate, you can have. You can have the best life, the best relationship, the best career, whatever that means for you, as long as you are the one to choose what that means.
So today I challenge you as you step into what's next in your life to ask yourself this question.
What am I willing to do to have the life that I want to have?
And today the answers still no excuses, just results, but maybe it's time to let go of the excuse that your identity is tied to you not being enough and instead start operating through kindness.
Unbroken Nation, thank you so much for listening.
My friends, I appreciate you.
Please, like, subscribe, comment, share.
Tell a friend.
And Until Next Time.
My friends, Be Unbroken.
-I'll see you.
Coach
Michael is an entrepreneur, best-selling author, speaker, coach, and advocate for adult survivors of childhood trauma.
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