E246: The Unbroken Man | CPTSD and Trauma Healing Coach

As a man, do you ever feel lost, broken, unheard and stuck?

What's up, Unbroken Nation! Hope that you're doing well wherever you are in the world today. So this episode is going to be very specific and women I know that you're listening to or however, you identify that's up to you I know that you're listening as well and I want to be very clear.

This episode is for everyone, but I'm guiding it to men and the reason why is because one of the big things that is happening that I'm super excited to announce is the launch of the pre-order for my next book called Unbroken Man A Man's Guide to being the Hero Of Their Own Story.

In October, I was sitting down and I wrote myself a note and I said coach men and this came from this place where I realized something really fascinating that women are often way ahead of the curve on, stepping up into the personal development trauma healing growth and doing the work.

So huge accolades to all of you and men while very hesitant at first I have found with the thousands and thousands of people have coached around the world. Now when they step into this Arena, their lives become so incredibly different. It's been an honor for me to serve in coach men and women and everyone around the world alike.

And as I sat in, I wrote this note to myself, at felt like this weird calling to a sense, it felt like if I don't do this, I'm going to have regret you have heard me say this many times. My greatest fear in life is regret. And so, I sat down, I sat, I wrote Unbroken Man and you can pre-order that book right now if you go, to men.thinkunbroken.com and it is accessible for both men and women. And so I want to be very clear about that but I want you to understand it is written to men through the viewpoint of a man. And I thought to myself, well, there's books going to benefit women and men alike because for women or however you identify again, that's my normative. There are tips and tools here that you will read from a man's perspective that may actually help you understand the men in your life better. And for men, there are tools in here that I would call the foundational Baseline 101 entry high level into what it means to step into this journey. And so if you preorder this, if you go to men.thinkunbroken.com that comments on paperback, it's on audio, it's on Kindle, it'll be on hardcover, here in a couple of weeks.

I'm going to talk to you about the impact of trauma.

I'm going to talk to you about this Human Experience that we're having as a man.

I'm going to talk to you about what it actually means to be a man.

We talked about asking for directions, about being kind to yourself, about making your bed, about community commitment and connection and about joining the group that will be launching in just a couple of months called Unbroken Man, which would be an in-depth year-long men's Collective, Healing Mastermind.

It's something I'm very excited about and so most details will be to follow when you pre-order one thing really interesting that you're going to get access to is the Discord channel that I've just built, that will be accessible for everyone, this is an open platform. Then you'll get access to our, six-week in-depth coaching program in the Think Unbroken App, which is over a thousand-dollar value that you'll be able to start using today, literally today.

So you'll sign up, you'll get a text and an email from me when you put in your order confirmation number and then we're going to send you that app where you can get in at six weeks of it's literally six weeks of me, coaching you every single day and that's something that I've never given as a bonus to anything that I've ever done. And I wanted to do this because I want it to be accessible to everybody.

And so as we're going through this journey, the one thing that I want to tell you is, you know, I think about what it means to be a man, what it means to be Unbroken and understand that there was so much toxicity, especially if you grew up in ways that I grew up as a little boy to be told boys, don't cry, and to man up and don't be a pussy and don't be a bitch and put some dirt on it and never hug men and never be vulnerable and don't cry and don't a moat and all those things and that's not who I am like at all. And it used to be who I was and I thought to myself, as I sat down to write this book, like, who am I today as a man? Who am I today as this person who's created themselves, who have grown themselves, to be the hero of their Own Story? And I said to myself, when you write this book, when you create this content for men, it's going to need to be real, it's going to be need to authentic, it's going to need to be vulnerable and truthful and honest and just straight down the middle. And so there's harsh language in it, there's some fucked up situations in it, there's some aggression in it, right? There's everything that I am that I've been able to understand about this to give you in a way that is real. But in it there is also practicality and kindness and hope and empathy and sympathy, and confidence and tools and actionable, and practical things that you can add to your life today to start seeing change.

And the book is a book you can read in a day I built it that way on purpose and its also part Journal. So just like my first book, Think Unbroken at the end of every single chapter, you're going to answer a ton of questions. You're going to grab a pen like I really hope that you'll buy this on paperback or hardcover because you're going to need a pen to write and you can do that on Kindle to, but I would definitely suggest that you have it physically in your hand because as you write, you're going to make meaning and real-time of the things that you're learning.

Now again, this is written for men from the scope and perspective of a man but if you are a woman or you want to help the men in your life, however, you identify like that is about very simply looking at an understanding that this may give you a little bit of insight that you've never had before to our experience. You know, it's amazing to have so many awesome women in my life, who coach women through trauma, through healing, through education and personal development, and learning to love themselves and they're so, so few men, I can name two men that I know who coach people in this space in trauma and personal development around healing, around toxic masculinity. And so I thought to myself, I want to put this together and I'll be clear like, I'm not perfect, I'm not like this guy speaking to you down on you from high like I'm going to fuck up, I'm going to make mistakes, I'm going to do things I said, I'd never do, I'm going to find myself in conflict, I'm going to always be moving forward and growing, and changing, and healing and leveling up and going to this 10x life and building all these things around me.

And so, this is simply a breakdown of my understanding of the core aspects of what I thought and I believe are the key attributes and understandings to be able to step into this hypothesis, that if you are willing to do the work that you can let go of toxic traits and these things that are poisonous as a man to step into love and compassion and hope and joy. And most importantly to get to that place where you can look in the mirror, that's the hardest thing that we do is to go and look in the mirror and be okay with the reflection on the other side. Especially as men, we carry so much shame, so much guilt, so much of the societal pressure, to man up, to don't be a pussy, to don't be a bitch, to put some dirt on it, but I have found in my life and in the men who are closest to me that those of us who have decided to step onto this path to become unbroken, live a life that is a complete 180 polar opposite of where we began this.

And so, if you're in this position where you're like, I'm this guy and I'm so stuck because of these past experiences. I feel lost, I can't ever seem to get direction, I have no real vulnerability with the men in my life, I always feel like I need more, I need guidance, I need help, I don't know what to do every time I start doing this shit, I fucked up, I need accountability, I need support, I need coaching, I need somebody to guide me to help me through the tunnel, I need to be able to go to what's next in my life so I can be a better man for myself, my family, my children, my partner, my community, my business, my church, my neighbor's, my friends, if that's where you are then you need to read this book because this book will change your life. That is a promise in a guarantee and just, like everything of Think Unbroken if you get this book and you hate it, I'll give you every penny back like that's how it always has been, is how it always will be? Because this isn't about money for me, this is about you changing your life because I've done it. I've coached thousands of people to do it, hundred of thousands of people every single year listen to this podcast and listen to the content that I put out and come into this journey of being unbroken. And if you're willing to step into this, I promise you that your life will be better. I fucking guarantee it but you've got to be willing to go for it, you've got to be willing to look at all the things that are in front of you, acknowledge and excess and accept the truth that you've been set up for failure as a man.

Ask yourself this question.

What does it mean to be a man?

Because if it's girls and clothes and money and drugs and cars, like it was for me 11, 12, 13, 15 years ago, good luck because I promise you it's not going to be different until you change it and you define what it means for you, to be a man as defined by you, not by anyone else. And when I made that change, when I made those declarations to myself, I watched everything in my world change; my finances, my body, my mind, my spirit, my soul, my relationships, my friendships, my community, my investments, everything got better when I defined for myself what it meant for me to be a man. That doesn't mean there hasn't been struggles, that doesn't mean there hasn't been mistakes because the truth is, as, you know, this we come from traumatic backgrounds it takes a long time to navigate this shit. It's a long time, and you'll learn, and you'll revert, and you'll take a step back and then you'll take five steps forward and that's how this works.

This healing Journey, this process is a forever process and it's a forever process that only works effectively if you have support and if you do not have support, if you are not supported, then I'm going to tell you just from my own experience you're not going to have success in this.

 No one great has ever done anything alone.

I mean, even as a man sitting here talking to you about Unbroken Man, sharing this experience, sharing this journey, sharing the possibility that you can have everything you've ever dreamed of and shed your toxic past and let go of the hurt and overcome and heal, and educate yourself as a person standing here, having this conversation with you today I can tell you that, like you, I started at one. I started at step one and that is where we start and as long as you are willing to start at step one, everything that you want can be yours.

Now, one of the questions that have been asked a couple times since I've been sharing kind of the background of this on social media it was well, what about the women who want to read this book? I actually wrote a small letter to all of the women who pick up this book at the beginning and I'll give you a synopsis because I want you to read the book and go and see this, it's very simple. This will give you insight to things that maybe you've always wondered about that will give you insights to asking and answering questions that can be beneficial in the journey, it will help you understand what it's like, for a man who comes from a traumatic background, who grows up in a toxic society, who's on a journey to trying to figure out how to be that person for themselves, you know, it's funny because so many people want everyone to be something for them and they forget to be that for themselves first. And so this a great tool and a great companion, whether you're male or female to at least give you some foundational, understanding. And my hope is that you'll pick this book up and be willing to uncover the truth. The truth. And the truth is that you get to define, you get to choose and you get to decide what it means to be an Unbroken Man. But like, so many of the thousands who have come before you up to this moment that I've guided that, I've coached that I've taught, you got to be willing to take that first step. I always tell you about (TEEM) Time, Effort, Energy, and Money.

You're going to have to invest all for here if you want to step in what's next. And a book is not that expensive so the money should be negligible. The time cost you energy, right? The effort you're going to have to put it in and when you get into this, you will see everything in your life change.

And so with that, if you go over to men.thinkunbroken.com, you'll be able to pre-order; when you pre-order and you put in your confirmation code we're going to give you access to the public Discord, we're going to give you access to the 6-week coaching program, which you can literally start today. It's me coaching you in an app every single day, for six weeks, over a thousand-dollar value. And when you sign up, you're also going to get some other things that I'm not telling you about yet, but one thing I will share is a weekly open group coaching session and that will launch in mid-April, so that's around the corner.

And if you're listening to this, after April, or watching this, after April, it's already live so come and join us!

That said, Unbroken Nation.

Thank you so much for being here, head over to men.thinkunbroken.com to grab your copy of Unbroken Man, A Man's Guide to being the Hero Of Their Own Story.

Please like subscribe, comment, share, and tell a friend.

And Until Next Time.

My friends, Be Unbroken.

-I'll see ya.