E273: The Ten Points of Power (PART 2) | Trauma Healing Podcast

Number six this one, I did not look when I started writing this, I want you guys to keep in mind I wrote these for me first, I am such a big proponent of making sure that you put on your oxygen mask first and that's what these ten points of power came from as I was sitting trying to figure out and discover who I am, how to show up in my life and who I wanna be.

And so, number six this one was incredibly important to me because going back to what I said a moment ago at one point in my life was three hundred fifty pounds, I was like I don't have run be three hundred and fifty pounds again, I need to create a rule, I need this thing in my life and so looking at this number six is put healthy food in your body.

Processed foods, sugars and alcohol, destroy your body, they destroy your serotonin, your dopamine, they inhibit so many different other chemicals that your brain produces, like, you have to think about the fact that your body effectively is a machine, this might sound robotic and it's not intentional in that but you have to treat it like a machine you have to put fuel in your car and change the oil and make sure that you keep it up or it breaks down. But we don't think about that like our body because we're in it every single day and it was when I sat and I thought to myself you know, healthy food matters, food is medicine. I read a book called food is medicine and then I read a book called the paleo cure and then I read all these other books and I won't tell you what foods eat, I'm not a doctor, I'm never gonna tell you that go find a doctor but I will say this be cognizant of what you're consuming because there is so much research around processed foods, sugar and alcohol that points to long term detrimental health ramifications not only physically but more importantly emotionally, right? People think like oh, I had a hard day, I'm gonna have a glass of wine and then next thing you know they're watching these crashes in dopamine and serotonin. So, just go and learn about these things, I'm not telling you don't like do whatever you want, free country you live your life and I'm not a doctor but what I am saying like take it into consideration.

Number seven, I think this is incredibly important. Find a therapist. And therapy I think is one of the most important outlets we have in the beginning of this journey is because we need to be able to make meaning of the experiences of our life, in correlation about how we behave.

Being able to identify behavioral patterns, I think is incredibly important and one of the things that I've learned over the years is that the deeper I get into things like therapy the more I'm able to make meaning of past experiences and create a reconciliation around those behaviors. So, if you don't have a therapist you know, there's so many avenues these days online therapy, text therapy, so many. I just think that you need to find someone who can be a benefit to your life who's an unbiased party, who's there to listen, who's there to support, who's there to help you and I have found that therapy has played such an incredible role in my life just because I was like, I don't really know what to do with all this chaos, right? I mean like, that's really where it started, I was like, I know I need to go to therapy and take a serious like, I don't know what to do with all, this feels so chaotic like all the time, who do I need to talk to? And then became a game changer, it gives you the ability and I know everybody talks about this but if you haven't found a therapist, please do. I'm not gonna go deep on that one because it's pretty self-explanatory.

Number eight of the ten points of power and I wanna just say thank you all for being here tonight just a moment of gratitude for each of you for being here, for showing up, for participating, for being unbroken, for being people who have decided and made decisions to educate themselves because I'll tell you right now the people who are in this room tonight will have a different outcome than the people who are not. I guarantee it and that comes because like the truth about this experience is we gotta learn, we have to be willing to educate ourselves and education is so predominant in my opinion as the forefront of this healing journey

Number eight, I think is incredibly important and again these are no particular order but this one feels really close to home for me it's leverage your community.

Leverage your community. Look the people around you, love you and care about you and they may actually understand this more than you think. Now I wanna be clear about this, leveraging your community isn't dumping all your crap on them and being like, I have the worst day, I need you to be my therapist you know, wife, husband, cousin, coworker that's not what I'm saying; what I am saying is hey, who can you reach out to in your life for support? Where do you need support? Where do you need help? Where do you need guidance? Where do you need to be able to connect with somebody and just say hey, do you have any ideas about this? Hey, maybe can you recommend this? Hey, where have you found support in that? Right? Because many people you will be shocked about how many people you know in your life who have turn their life around. Now a lot of people don't talk about it but those that do, think about it, leverage them, can you have a conversation, can you grab a coffee and just say hey, can you tell me three of the things that you've done in your life to create a difference, right?

The people in your community, I can tell you they want to see you succeed and I have found that so true time and time again literally just before this I was on a call with one of the people in my coaching community, not Think Unbroken but where I go, where I'm coached, where I learned and we had a phenomenal conversation because we wanna pull each other up, we wanna help each other rise, we teach each other, we leverage each other's experiences to be able to circumvent the and expedite the speed in which we can we can go to what's next. And so just think about who do you know? Who do you know in your life that can be a support you? Who do you know in your life that if you need to ask them a question can be there for you?

And again, I think you need to get clear one of the things people make a mistake about especially here is they just start dumping shit on people, they don't say hey, let me create a rule for you here. If you are going to reach out to somebody in your community before you dive into that thing just say, hey, is it okay or are you a person that I can have this kind of conversation with? Because some people are gonna tell you yes and some people are gonna tell you no. And so just be cognizant of that.

Number nine, run the ten points of power. It's Tuesday night guys if you don't know this there is a link in my BIO on social media, you can register for Tuesday night coaching where you'll get notified every Tuesday night, when we go live five pm mountain standard time, I'm gonna be teaching, Im gonna go deep not even just this stuff but everything Think Unbroken. I wanna give you guys the tools that I've learned to help you change your life because I know that we all have the ability and the power to be the hero of our story this is meaningful to me, this is a way that I get a give back to you guys. So, Tuesday night coaching, it's about a showing up together, it's about as learning, it's about us preparing ourselves to be successful and so I'm teaching you tonight the ten points of power, this is a document that I created over four and a half years ago when I first got deep into starting Think Unbroken and I want you guys to be able to learn from it. Also, the new book Unbroken Man coming out, you can pre-order that at men.thinkunbroken.com and if you do so you're gonna have access to a ton of free resources, so I'm gonna send out email more information on that to come. So, Tuesday night, thank you guys for being. Here going deep into the ten points of power we have covered eight of them, we're gonna cover number nine and again these are no particular order, I actually thought to myself, I don't even know I numbered them because then people will think they are, that's four and a half years ago so things change.

 Number nine which still holds true to this day which many of you know and on proponent of this I am a huge, huge proponent of this is, get out of your bed and make it.

Make your damn bed. Look it's something that I know seems so arbitrary and all the chaos of life but when I rewind my journey and I'm like at the beginning of this and I'm going through healing and I'm trying to figure everything out and I'm like okay, wait a second, I think I kinda know who I am and what I want to do. I think, I'm kinda healing but I'm having these really hard days and there's days I can't change and nothing is working. I found that if I just made my bed every single day like, if I got up, before the alarm and made my bed and just got like literally just physically got and made that bed, I automatically had something that I accomplished every day. And that effort of making your bed takes forty-eight seconds and if you're willing to take about forty-eight seconds, you're going to accomplish something, whereas if you don't and if you're like me so, I'll paint your picture before this moment. I would lay in bed and I would get high and I would turn on the TV and I would be there for hours and do nothing. And it was what I realized wait a second that's not actually productive why am I doing this? It was when I realized that and I made a decision to start and this was important, I made a decision and decided I’m going to start getting up before my alarm, I'm gonna get out of bed, I'm gonna make my bed. When I started making my bed what happened was really crazy. I actually started to build some confidence in myself and what happened is after that I started cleaning my room and then I started cleaning other aspects of my home and then I started taking care of myself more and what happened it became this incredible like, trickle-down effect that was this really interesting snowball where it started with okay, if I make my bed at least I feel good about myself for eight seconds into okay, cool, now I have an entire framework for how I live my life.

And again, I know I get it, you're thinking yourself like why make your bed? Most people don't. I read a study, I mean who knows if this is accurate or not but I read a study once a couple of years ago and it said on average only twenty one percent of people on the entire planet earth make their bed in the morning. And so that percentage of people, you know what's happening? They are accomplishing something that eighty percent of people are not. And so, if you can do the small things, you can do the big things. You know, I think about this all the time how you do anything is how you do everything and you might be thinking well, what does that have to do with anything? What is making your bed really have do with? Making your bed in the morning is you taking control over your life; that is the essence of this whole thing, right? How do you take control of your life? How do you be the hero of your own story?

And finally heading into number ten, arguably the best of the ten depending on who you ask of the ten points of power. And you know this is part of my everything, it's been something that has created the framework for who I am today, it's been probably one of the most predominant things in the way that I think about the world, it became the catalyst for all the change that you see today, it's been the thing that's driven me to success.

Number ten, my favorite on this list personally is no excuses, just results.

We make so many excuses in our life, we can always find a reason to not be successful but no excuses, just results means very simply what are you willing to do. What are you willing to do to have the life that you wanna have? Because you're gonna have to get out of your own way. And look, you have the power, you are actually in control of your life that more so than you probably think or understand. You're in control of your life in such an incredible way that everything that you do matters. But the excuses that we make they get in our way. And so, when we make excuses we're stuck, we can't change, this is how I am, this is how I was raised, this is just what I know I don't wanna be anybody to, like, whatever that thing is, whatever that excuses that we make it keeps us stuck. And the hard part about being stuck in that is that when you're making excuses nothing changes.

So, when I say no excuses just results. Result isn't necessarily even about the final product. Results isn't about even crossing the finish line. Results is about did you show up because the result of showing up is gonna teach you something different about yourself than what you know right now then most people hedge against failure and say, you're not why bother? Why should I deserve this? Why do I get this? And they don't show up and the people that do show up who become and I want you to think about this, I want you to write this down if somebody watching, writing this down right now is you become solution oriented.

How do you become solution oriented and what does it mean to be solution-oriented? How do you find the way to win?

It's easy to find the way to fail, it's easy, you just don't show up, you don't try that hard, you don't learn, you don't grow, that's easy. But if you wanna find the way to win you've gotta make no more excuses, you've got to be willing to put yourself in a position to be successful by seeking positive outcomes and results. And look, I tell people this all the time, I am not an optimist, I'm not. I am not one of those people who is glass half full, I'm just like there's a glass has water in it, I am a realist. And what that means in my life is I just simply evaluate, has this been done before, has this thing that I'm trying to accomplish been done before? Because I'm gonna tell you right now, if the thing that you're trying to accomplish has been done before then you have the ability to also do it.

So many people don't think that they do because they are not worthy of it. You are the one who determines and evaluates yourself worth, nobody else gets to choose that for you and so, if you want you can have it but you have to earn it by not making excuses but instead going forward towards that goal at all times and this terminology, this motto, this life mantra for me no excuses, just results actually my next tattoo with schedule we're gonna get that done is about recognizing the truth. You can have it. If you believe you can, you can. If you believe you, can it will happen.

Now you have to be patient, you have to do the work, you have to show up every day but as long as you become results oriented, you stopped making excuses everything about your life will be different.

So, guys, I wanna say thank you for being here tonight, on Tuesday night coaching. I'm gonna recap here for you the ten points of power but give me one second, I wanna grab some… so, before we pop into the recap thank you for being here again. I'm share with you guys so this is the first author copy of the new book of Unbroken Man. So, this is gonna come out on June sixteenth, this is a deep dive into tools for men because I realized we need a man's guide.

One of my really incredible friends who coaches women she and I were talking and she's like, why doesn't by coach men? I was like, I don't actually know and I thought to myself, what if we change that? And this is a book that I recommend that you pick up for yourself for your brother, for your husband, for your friend, for your son, for everybody, it's Unbroken Man A Man's Guide to Being Hero of Your Own Story, this comes out June sixteenth, it's on amazon, it's on Barnes and noble, it's on Walmart but if you go to men.thinkunbroken.com you can actually get pre-order bonuses and those bonuses are worth over a thousand dollars and that's access to coaching program, access to a whole bunch of other really cool stuff. So, before I recap the ten points of power just check out men.thinkunbroken.com and you'll be able to get this. I think we're at like, I wrote like thirty-five thousand forty thousand words, so it's pretty in book it's over two hundred pages long and it's gonna talk about how to redefine what it means to be a man, it's gonna talk about vulnerability, asking for help, the three core principles of healing, how do that go the past, the importance of kindness and why the words we use matter. This book is special to me, I'm very excited for it to come out. And one of the things I'll say about this is that when you read this book it's yes, it's for men but it's not only for men in fact the opening of it is actually dedicated to Unbroken Women that's how I wanted to start the book because none of us would be here without you so thank you for that. And so, as we begin to head off for the evening again if you check out men.thinkunbroken.com you'll be able to check out the book but I wanna recap the ten points of power for you.

Ten points of power created this document four and a half years ago it is the foundation. If I believe or recall correctly was one of the very first things that I created in Think Unbroken. I might have been the first thing that I created so let's recap the ten points of power.

• TEN POINTS OF POWER –

Number one, change happens when you become who you are.

Number two, meditate for five minutes every day.

Number three, write every day.

Number four, you are not broken.

Number five, move your body.

Number six, put healthy food in your body.

Number seven, find a therapist.

Number eight, leverage your community.

Number nine, get out of your bed and make it.

Number ten, no excuses just result.

So, Unbroken Nation, all of you I want thank you for being here wherever you are in the world.

Next Tuesday night, five o'clock, we will be back here just check out the link in my bio we'll go to thinkunbroken.com to sign up for Tuesday night coaching. So, for all of you here, thank you for being here, I hope that you learned a lot of hope you had takeaways with a couple minutes left if anybody has any questions, I'm happy to dive into doing Q&A with you here. So, you can either just raise your hand let me know you have a question, I'll be more than happy to bring you on, so we have a couple minutes here if anybody has any questions more than happy to dive in with you to go over the ten points of power, to help you create massive change in your life wherever you are and if not that's okay too. I know some people get camera shy especially when there's hundreds of people watching across all the social media platforms right now. So, I don't see any hands, I don't see any questions so, I'm gonna say thank you all for being here. I appreciate you.

And we will see you next Tuesday.

And until then my friends, Be Unbroken.