Heal Your Money Trauma and Find Financial Peace | with Ken Honda

Today I am going to talk about how to hear many trauma. I'm joining you from my retreat center in Yatsugatake, which is outside of Tokyo to our ride from Tokyo. So I guess I'm on the other side of the planet, but I'm honored to be able to join you, because of the technology like this. Five years ago, we couldn't have done it. There was internet, but the internet was so slow. So I don't think we could, possibly send these files or we cannot be connected this way. Maybe like very slowly, you know? But, I guess you can see me clearly. I, and hear me, okay. Okay. Can you hear me okay? All right, okay, good. So, let me talk about myself, for a few minutes and then dive into the world of happy money and how to heal your, money trauma. I'm going to start a three day retreat on how to become a writer, how to become a best selling, box and how to be a writer. So, I'm so excited to share with you about this topic because this one is, the core essence of who I am and how I began to write about 20 years ago. So let me just share this screen with you here, I hope you can see me okay, alright. Okay, how to heal your money trauma. So I call myself a money healer because I've done a lot of healing around money. I have an accounting background and consulting background, I used to work with my father, with my brother, who was a tax accountant, and also I studied, consulting firm myself. So I have helped the startup companies. And in my twenties, I made a lot of money by being an investor. And also I was, busy working as a consultant marketer. So I helped my clients succeed in the process. I made enough money so I could retire, at the age 29 and during the four years of summer retirement, I got this expression to write a book, and I studied to write ever since. And when I look at my life, I turned 55, recently, this money healing was always with me, since I was a child. I was with my father, who was a very successful tax accountant, and he studied teaching me about money and how to make money, how to save money, how to accumulate money, those things, in my early teens, in fact, he started teaching me when I was very little. So that's why I could succeed when I was very young. And at the same time, my father got into a depression. So I started to go for a quest on how to heal him, he became alcoholic. So even though our family had enough money, but we are not happy. So a lot of people think that more happy, more money can bring happiness, but in my family, that's the opposite. So, I became interested in learning about, healing, and in the process of my quest to learn about money and happiness, I became a money healer, and in my twenties and also in my 30s and 40s and 50s, I became a writer and started teaching people about how to heal their relationship with money and how to transform their money beliefs and became financially more successful. Some people became millionaires, and in the process they found what they loved, so they started their own business, some people stayed in big companies, but they found, the true calling in a big in a big company. So, either way, a lot of people have found peace with money. So this is what I'm going to share with you. And the reason why I became so happy and successful is that I've been coached by so many people, like Janet on my le on my left or right. She's founder of the Passion Test, and she is also the initiator for the movement's secret. She was just started the whole thing. She helped the band to start the whole project with TLC members. I became a TLC member, transformation Leadership Council with Jack Kenfield on my left and John Gray on my right. So these are my mentors who mentored me to become a happy person. And this is a book I published worldwide three years ago. Happy Money, the Japanese Auto Making Peace With Your Money, and Inside I talked a lot about happiness and healing. So we go into deeper with today's session. And Happy Money is in our now probably like 20, 45, languages and 50 countries by now. And in Japanese, I have probably a lot of books. It depends on how to count, but more than 200 physical books are in Japanese, and sold more than 8 million copies in the past 20 years. So I'm going to share with you the essence, true essence of what I teach. And this is my podcast has been downloaded more than 15 million times, which is almost half the population of Japan. And 15% or 20% of us, I guess. And I teach about happiness, abundance, doing what you love, financial freedom, money IQ, money EQ, your life purpose goal, manifestation, and finding your life work and more. And how I began teaching about happiness and money. When I was as when I had four years off of my life in mylate twenties and early thirties, because of my baby girl, I got this inspiration on writing small essays. So I started writing small essays on happiness and money because a lot of my friends asked me, why can't you retire so early? How can I make money? How can I be happy like you? So I started teaching and I didn't charge anybody. I had a lot of time because all I did it was change diapers and, you know, did the a lot of cleaning, even though we had this housekeeper to help us. I wanted to do that myself especially for clothes diaper, which requires 10 times cleaning a day. But anyway, during the four semi retire, beautiful semi retirement years, I got this inspiration to write. One day I was at the, I was in a park with my girl, so probably she was two or three, very young, but she was able to enjoy the swing. And so we probably like spent hours doing that, and then we had a little time off, with our snacks, and we saw a mother and a daughter came to the swing and they started playing. So after about 10 or like 15 swings the mother said, okay, we gotta go. And the daughter said, mommy, we got here. We just got here, she was right, they just got there, but the mother said, your mom has to work, so let's go. And, she literally drugged her, pulled her out of the swing, and then disappeared. She was almost running out of the park, and I saw that. And really, I felt this, heartbreak in my heart that, oh, I'm sure if they that, if they can say, skip the work, if they don't have to work, if she doesn't have to work, they could have stayed in the park for a longer time, and but that really hit me, a lot of people have to work, because of money. So, if they learn more about money, their life could have been different. They could have chosen something else. So I got this, this inspiration to write about money. And, also I want to introduce you, my mentor, Wahei Takeda, who's called Warren Buffet of Japan. Look at his smile, he was one of the wealthiest individuals in Japan, when he was alive, and he passed away a few years ago. And he taught me about, appreciation. He's so powerful and aga toing aga to out. I had this very brief time with him at the beginning. I asked him, what is a secret to money? And Wahei said, arigato to your money. And then I got pushed from the back because, you know, there's a long line and I just wonder, what is arigato to your money mean? And later I had this, opportunity, more opportunity to talk with him. And he explained, when the money comes in, appreciate the money for coming in, and when money leaves your life, also appreciate it again. By doing so, you start this cycle of appreciation. So, that is Wahei’s money philosophy. So I learned with him and intensely and he talked about Maro Up, which is also a book, that I wrote with Janet Attwood that you saw me, saw with me. If you Google Maro Up or Ken Honda or Janet Attwood, this book will come up, we talk, we wrote about him. Compassion raises your energetic vibration. It is the essence of what he taught. And this is, his gold Museum. And this is a book, so if you're interested in learning about him, please check it out. I think it was, like 99 cents or very affordable price. And this is Wahei’s dream Castle, it's outside of Nagoya where Toyota is. He built this castle because a lot of girls and boys in the area is far from Tokyo, Disneyland. So, for the people, for the, and the families who cannot go to Disneyland, he thought, why not build a castle? How outrageous is that? But Wahei made his fortune by selling cookies for kids and babies. So he's in fact like, you know, Charlie and Chocolate Factory. He is really Charlie, he's like that person in the movie. So he built this real castle outside of Nagoya. And in there you can cook cookies and cakes and all kinds of sweets. And when you go in there, you can smell beautiful like very sweet thing. And this is kids heaven. And also, not only for kids, but I don't know how many of you are familiar with anime. Maybe your kids are, this is a Mecca. This is a sacred place for all these cosplayer. So they dress up like anime characters, and then they take pictures. So this was his dream castle. And today I want you to, think of, money in a different angle. Wahei taught me a lot about how to look at money in a different way. So for you, if you are driving, you can do it later, but if you are just watching me, you can write it down or you can think about it. What does money mean to you? This is the most important question today, money is security, money is freedom. Money is a curse, whatever that is. Um, that, um, is what money is it, money becomes like comedian, it changes shapes according to what you, and money means different things for two different people. Money could be freedom, security, power, validation, love, appreciation, self-expression and responsibility. It depends on who you are and how you relate with money. And there's nothing right or wrong about that, but that's what it is. What, that's what it is, and that's what it became for you. And the reason why we are so puzzled with money is there are a lot of emotions around money, especially negative ones. So let me just point out negative ones, jealousy, hatred, resentment and sadness, despair, anger, and worthlessness. We don't feel worthy, that's why we can ask for a raise. We feel worthless. So that's why we cannot, raise our fee. And we are afraid of jealousy and we don't want to fee hatred or resentment against anybody. But we feel resentful toward money because there is not enough and there is not love in the family because of money or money fights. But that's a lot of I'd say most of us experienced when we are younger. Now also, there are positive emotions around money. So these are the five positive emotions with money, love, joy, appreciation, freedom, and happiness. I'm sure you have experienced in the past that somebody gave you money and then you feel so loved. You were joyful, you felt appreciation when somebody gave you the bonus or the money and you feel freedom, you feel happiness. And these emotions come with money too. And it's up to you which emotions you choose. Even if you are given the same amount of money, say a hundred dollars or a thousand dollars, you can feel love or you can feel resentful. It's your choice, so it's how much ever that is. Please remember you have a choice and your relationship with money. There are only three kinds, be a friend to money, be controlled by money. This is how I go back or try to control money. So there are only three relationships and the best way is to become a friend and don't be controlled by money or try to control money. If you try to control money, you become a slave to and many IQ principles, I go quickly and earning and making money, spending and using money, protecting and saving money, increasing and investing money. These are all the financial knowledge about money, you can learn about these in so many places, but I have to point you one thing. It used to be like this, everything was inflated, the stock and the bitcoins and everything, but now it's a different trend. So all the money IQs could be so wrong, so you have to be aware of that, but there's this knowledge side of money IQ and money EQ principles are receiving money. Well, you have to receive well in order to feel happy, enjoy money and feel abundance enjoying the money is very important because a lot of people feel indifferent. They're excited, but they cannot feel it. So enjoying the money is very important, trusting in the flow of money, trusting the flow is the hardest because we tend to worry about money, we feel like money may not come in. We feel like we'll be outta work. We feel like, it may be hard to make both ends meet, these are the worries we have and sharing money. Well sharing money is always, important, it doesn't really matter how much you share. I advise people when you feel money worries, just donate a dollar for $2. Could be $10 depending on your, financial situation, but just try to feel after donating a dollar or $10 or a hundred dollars, you probably feel different. This feels good, you know? Because it donating makes you feel that you have more than enough, so donating a dollar always helps you to relieve money, worries. And why is healing so important? Because we are so stuck with our money belief that happened so many years ago, like when you were a child you were denied of a summer camps or piano lessons, and we felt so unworthy. We felt something was wrong with us. That's why we stopped dreaming our ideal life, problems from unhealed, money issues are overrunning. You may end up earning more, you may become a doctor or a lawyer or entrepreneur but you cannot stop overrunning over, earn the money because you feel afraid. One day I'm out of work, one day I am out of money, so I have to keep earning over saving, you may end up saving money for nothing, you know? Saving money is great, but save for what, you have to live your life too. So don't get stuck in the security, overspending, people feel they're in control. When they spend the money, they become addicted to spending. So overspending is not also a healthy, place to be, or worrying and stress, worrying about money once in a while is okay because we are humans. But, worrying all the time is not healthy because, most of the things we worry does not does not happen in reality. So, if you tend to worry about money or worry about life, you have to check what's bothering you and numbing yourself. We don't want to feel this negative feelings, so we may title numb our self so we don't feel anything. So when money comes in, nothing, when money leaves, nothing. So instead, you can feel both positive and negative feelings, emotions, and still you can choose. So, common money, drama is dead and its consequences, divorce, family separation, getting yelled at for wasting money. How many of you, have you experienced that bullying and jealousy and how to hear your money wounds? I cannot go into all the details, but I'm sorry, like, showing you what you can do after this. Accept that what happened wasn't your fault or your parents' fault, you know, when your parents are younger, maybe younger than you now, they didn't know anything about life. They were out of word, they were out of work or they were just out of college or whatever happens. They were not matured, they were not secured. So they felt so insecure about life and money, but they did their best. Their best may not be sufficient for you when you were young, but can you at least understand what happened and accept what happened, because you have a choice either accepting the past and move on or get stuck in the past, understand what happened in a new light. Please understand that what happened, you cannot erase it, but the interpretation of what had happened is something you can change, you know, you may not get the bike, or you may not get your dream summer camp, but still you're here, and then you can choose to feel happy too. So please find your peace inside after looking at what happened. So understand what happened in a new light. If you can give them understanding and possibly forgive them for being stupid or sufficient, inner sufficient or incapable of bringing the best to you, they did their own best, and can you understand them and can you forgive them for not being perfect and forgiven? If feel compassion for your parents and forgive yourself too, it was not your fault at all, you just happened to be there and your parents didn't do the right job or ideal job. So if you understand everything what happened, and then, if you accepted us, what it is, and just give them love, you change the perspective of your life. And from now on, you can, you feel more powerful. When something bad happens, you'll still have the power to choose, how you can interpret what's gonna happen. And healing many wounds heals your life, more freedom, if you heal your past, you feel more, free to choose anything less worry and stress and improve money management. Maybe before you don't want to touch the subject or you don't want to think about it, but now you may be able to manage it well, a more adventure and joy, once you don't have to worry about money, you may be studying you may able to start planning your dream vacation or come up with more healthy attitude towards money. And what would he do once you find peace with money is the question I want to give to you. Finding peace with money, is fairly simple. I wouldn't say it's easy because you have so many blocks about emotional energy around money, but it's very simple, it's your choice and it's our choice. Do you feel peace is more important than the stress? If so, let's find out what peace feels like and then find peace inside, and if that's what you want, you can say over money or stress, I want to choose peace. If you breathing a few times and say that over and over a few times, I think, it's nothing to do with your financial situation, but you can probably feel more peaceful and healthier.

And that is the end of my presentation. Arigato is a word I want to give to you. Over the past 20 years, I have helped hundreds and thousands of people personally and with my books. And I have impacted million of people, and in the morning I get up in the morning and I check my email inbox and then there are many emails coming in from all over the world saying, thank you, Ken. I've been saying, I did it all every day when money comes in, when I spent spend money, my life is completely different and it doesn't cost you anything. So please appreciate, please enjoy your money because life is to be enjoyed and for a lot of things, it has a price tag. So you may not be able to do everything, but if you can enjoy one thing at a time, you'll be amazed how much life will offer you. And so, please enjoy money and please enjoy life. One day I want to see you in person, I studied online community, it's called Arigato Living Community, you can find all the information at kenhonda.com. I'm translating a lot of stuff into English, and hopefully I'll make him you, I make you in person. And please enjoy the rest of the beautiful seminars and I'm just sending you all my love and all my happiness to all of you. Thank you. Bye-bye.