How to Take Control of Your Health and Age Stronger | with Kimberly Verbeke

Michael Unbroken: Over the course of my life, one of the things that I have shifted my focus on too, to make it the impetus of how I kind of navigate the world is my wellness. I want to age better. I want to have a better quality of life, and ultimately, I don't want to die earlier and more sick. Hopefully not sick at all.

I witnessed a lot of my family die. Young diabetes, heart attacks, different things of that nature, including dementia. And for me. came a real aha, mind blowing moment for me at 25 years old where I looked at my life and I was like, I'm 350 pounds, smoking two packs a day, drinking myself to sleep, partying every night, have massive insomnia, having five panic attacks a day.

And I was like, I am going to die. And it was a light switch moment for me where everything shifted. And I'm so excited to have Kimberly Verbeke on the show today so we can talk about how we actually can create real change in our life to age better, to feel better, to take care of ourselves. One of the biggest things in the world that so many people have experienced as trauma don't do effectively. Well. So with that said, Kimberly, welcome to the show, my friend.

Kimberly Verbeke: Thank you for having me. I'm excited to be here.

Michael Unbroken: So first and foremost, one of the things that I think about a lot is how do we take better care of ourselves? You're an expert at this. You have helped thousands and thousands of people create these life transformations in their physical body alongside their mental wellbeing.

And I know as well as anyone that generally speaking, when we take a path like that and normally starts with us. So what was your journey? What has kind of led you to this place where you have put, your health and other people's health at the forefront of how you spend your time in your life?

Kimberly Verbeke: I started out in geriatrics, that was my very first job. I worked in a nursing home in rehab, and I always say that when you start out at end of life, you know exactly what you don't want. It's glaring, right? So take that and then fast forward, I was doing endurance sports, had some pretty significant stress and found my own health really deteriorating. And through that process, it was like a light bulb born off for me. And I was going to have to figure out how to fix myself. And BI wanted to help other people that were in the same situation.

Michael Unbroken: When you go look at your experience, like what, what even let's rewind a little bit here 'cause I want to definitely create a lot of context today and fill up some space so that people can have a real understanding for, first, what is geriatrics? And secondly, how did you find yourself in that career path to begin with?

Kimberly Verbeke: Yeah, so geriatrics, right? Nursing home people that at the end of their life that weren't able to care for their self any longer. you know, their families typically find somewhere where they are in a, an assisted living situation. So you get everything from, we had an Alzheimer's and dementia ward to people that just aren't the lack, the mobility or, know, they just need help caring, caring for their self. So I ended up there because when I kind of was in my high school years, I decided I wanted to be a doctor. And through that experience, um, working in a nursing home, I changed my mind.

I was fortunate enough at that time it required a certification to give medication in shots. And so I got my training to do that, and I was raised very holistic, so I didn't know a lot about medicine, that experience was so eye-opening for me because I thought that the medicine was gonna make these people better, and they were band-aids that often created other situations where they would need additional medications. And I was just super disheartened by that. It was not what I thought it was gonna be. and which is, you know, how I didn't end up continuing on, on the path to be a medical doctor.

Michael Unbroken: One of the things that I think that as I reflect on experiences and especially dealing with people who are having these transitions out of life, for a lack of a better way to phrase it, is there's just so many lessons.

And you said that if you start out with the end of life in mind, it kind of shows you what you don't want. And I vividly remember watching members of my family to, to say the word suffer might be an understatement in regard to how they died. And it, it was just pain and pain and pain. And some of these people on literally 15 medications, one medication to solve the problem to the other.

And then it's kind of like this infinite loop. What, when we live in a society now where we have forgotten how to take care of ourselves and we have kind of relegated our own care to other people. What did you witness in these geriatric places? Like what sparked for you? Were like, I don't want that, I don't want this experience, there has to be a better way.

Kimberly Verbeke: So one of the things that really stood out to me was someone would come in be admitted and their kids would come in and let's just say it was a 76-year-old man fell and broke his hip, his kids would come in, get his living space set up and they'd be like, oh, my dad's just here for six months to rehab. He's like, great, totally sharp with it. Drives soon as he is feeling better, we'll take him home. And it didn't take very long for me to figure out that it was likely their dad would be dead within the next 10 months. Why? Well, what caused that hip break to begin with was sarcopenia, lack of lean body mass.

You take a person without enough lean body mass and lay them in a bed for three months, what do you think is gonna happen to 'em? They now have less lean body mass. They have less of an appetite, don't want to eat, they're losing muscle, and before you know it, they end up with pneumonia or you know something else and they're dead.

And it's mind-boggling because you're like, wait, a few months ago, this person was taking care of their self-slipped and fell, broke their hip. Now they're gone. And I saw that so often that I was like, wait, this, this is weird what's going on? And I, at a very young age, was into lifting weight. And so by the time I was in my early twenties, I started to recognize that that muscle played a role in health.

It wasn't till a little later that I really did the math on how much of a role it plays in your health, but I knew even back then that these people were weak and they were frail.

Michael Unbroken: When does that start? Right? Is that a, is that a problem that occurs when people are in their sixties or seventies? Is it earlier? When do we start to lose this lean body mass and when do we start and how does it affect us? Like how does it impact us?

Kimberly Verbeke: I think currently it's a, an epidemic with young people because we've got a lot of young people that are like sitting and playing video games and, you know, I don't know about you, but like, when I was young, I was outside riding my bike.

I was playing tag, you know, like I was active outside with my friends. I was not sitting in the house. I didn't grow up with tv, so I definitely wasn't sitting in the house watching tv. But video games really didn't come about till I was probably 10 or 11 maybe young people now. Are under muscled much, much sooner than it used to be. Right. It used to be more of a, people started to move into middle age, become less active women through, went through menopause, really started losing muscle. And then it was a problem, we're seeing that much younger and much younger, and it's why we're seeing younger and younger people with metabolic disease like diabetes, you know, things that we used to see much later in life is now happening much earlier. And part of it is because people don't have enough lean body mass.

Michael Unbroken: When we're looking at this, I think that discipline, for lack of a better way to phrase it, has almost completely and entirely left our society. And I think that that's one of those things that. Our physicality has become kind of a scapegoat in a lot of ways, and this is not to say that of course there's a small percentage of people who perhaps are predestined and predisposition to be overweight or to not have a fully functioning metabolic system because that's just human nature and that's the way it is. Sure. But as we approach 60% obesity rate in the United States, that tells me that there's actually a bigger underlying problem.

And what I look at and I always speak to this because it's like a, an experience that I had when I was 350 pounds. I can promise you that I wasn't doing the things that I knew I needed to do. There's something that inter like lies under this in a psychological level where I think people are kind of okay with having a shitty life. Do you think that holds true or am I just making that up? 'cause like when I look at my life at 25, I was like, I guess this is just how it is.

Kimberly Verbeke: I agree with you. I think people have just kind of resigned themself to, eh, this is just, you know, this is just how I feel. this is how it is. And they accept that and they also put their health, like they make their health someone else's responsibility. That's not my problem.

Michael Unbroken: How do we start to, 'cause I know a big part of what you do in working with people is not only just the physical side of it, but there's this mental shift that happens. I think a lot of people feel like they're too far gone though. Do you see that?

Kimberly Verbeke: I mean, I do see, think there are situations where people feel that way, and I always remind people no matter what their situation, if you are breathing, you have hope, and you have to change your mindset about things. It will it take work? Yes. Will you be perfect? No, but it's not about perfection. It's about making progress and. You know that autonomy over your own body. You have the power to change things no one else does. Your doctor doesn't live with you. He doesn't control what you put in your mouth, what time you go to bed, whether or not you hang out in stressful relationships or right.

All these things that we are the only one that has the power over our own life. And so we have to decide that we're gonna make those changes. And I, I see people often kind of get the cart before the horse. You know, they're like, oh, I wanna do all these cool biohacking things. And I go, that's the cherry on top.

You need to get the cake ingredients right first. You need to go to bed at the same time every night, and you need to get up and see morning sunlight. You need to prioritize eating real food. You need enough protein and oh, that super crappy relationship you're in. I don't know. Do you think it's making you better, right? Getting people to understand that it's the whole picture, like everything that's constant in your life or that's happening all the time plays a massive role in your health?

Michael Unbroken: Yeah. Well, it's hard because I think that people feel these ideas of restraint of, okay, I have to eat healthy and I have to do this, and I have to do that. Takes away their autonomy, takes away maybe their identity in a lot of ways. And, and I remember having this experience when I was really starting to create the shift where I just had to kind of reconcile a truth that I think that is overlooked a lot in this conversation, but also holds very, very true.

You know, one of the things that you said is that you grew up in a, a holistic household. Most of us did not. I'm not joking. I did not have a salad for the first time until I was probably like 20 years old and I grew up in a food desert, right? And so all we had was fast food and junk food, and store food, corner store food, all of those things, and there's been a lack of education that I think has just set people up for complete failure. And so, on the one hand, I believe now in the age of the internet, social media, we have YouTube, we have ChatGPT, we have access to information. We are the ones who have to take our lack of a better rephrase it, but our life into our own hands and create control. But there's also the reality that this is not something that we've been equipped to be able to handle and navigate. So where do we start? Like if I'm listening to this, I'm going, you know what? I'm 350 pounds. I'm smoking, I'm drinking, I'm partying. I'm in a shit relationship. My money's bad, my health's bad. Like, things just are not working for me. Everyone talks about accountability. I try, but it doesn't work. Like where do I begin? What's a feasible starting point?

Kimberly Verbeke: I think in those situations, you start with one thing. I think if you feel completely overwhelmed, you start and go, I'm gonna do one thing and get that thing right. And then when I feel powerful enough or strong enough, I'm gonna add something else. So maybe that one thing you add in is you go, I'm gonna go for a walk for 10 minutes every morning. During that first two hours of sunlight and get some full spectrum light. 'cause that's gonna have a massive impact on my hormones, my circadian rhythm, how I feel.

I'm also gonna get some movement in right. it's just small, it's 10 minutes. I can commit to 10 minutes and I try to get people to build on things like that. If they aren't sleeping well, I have them start with their sleep because I believe sleep is the foundation of our health. If we're not sleeping well, it's real hard to fix things. Sleep is when we repair, detoxify, heal, and we need that restorative time. I think that's one of the first things to get right. But if that's already decent. If you have good sleep, start with just something small that you can do. Maybe, maybe you're eating fast food for every meal and you just go, okay, one meal I'm going to eat at home every day, or I'm going to eat three meals a week at home instead of eating out, start somewhere. You don't have to flip your life upside down. But often those little changes create momentum, right? And the person starts to feel better and then they feel strong enough to add in more, to make more changes. And that's when the magic starts to happen.

Michael Unbroken: Yeah, definitely. And it's one of those things where it does become a snowball effect and the momentum, like you can have momentum in the wrong direction, right? At one point, and this is not exaggeration, I was eating fast food for every meal. Every single meal every day. And so at 26, I had the early beginnings of fatty liver disease because I mean, obviously it's 350 pounds, right? And, and I look at my myself today, being closer to two 20, it's like, there's actually this really interesting mindset shift that happens as well, because you realize that you're allowed to take care of yourself.

And I think that's one of the things people don't really bear witness to. And I know there's like coaching element to what you do when you have somebody who's sitting with you and they just, I mean maybe they're apathetic, maybe they just don't care. Maybe they're, they're like, you know, I, I give up.

Like, how do you start the conversation around just what's in their head about this journey? 'cause I think people feel just a tremendous sense of shame about their selves right now, and it probably intensified just by social media.

Kimberly Verbeke: I had a conversation with somebody about that yesterday that said they felt shameful over their labs. They were ashamed at how terrible their labs looked. And I said, okay, but that's not productive. What can we do to change it? I understand you're upset. I understand you're disappointed. can make changes. This can look completely different a year from now. You have that power, so reminding people that the power is in your hands. It's not in someone else's hands, it's in your hands, and your body's so incredibly capable of healing.

Michael Unbroken: In conversation, that sounds easier said than done. Sure. Right? What is the shift that people should consider looking for, right? Like what are the markers? What are the spaces where it's like, okay, I can actually see that I can shift this? Are there any things that people can like, look for here that's gonna help them?

Kimberly Verbeke: I think every person's a little different. What motivates them, right? We're all individuals. Like some people are motivated by longevity, some people are motivated by how they look, some people are motivated by what other people think about them.

So I think you look for those little emotional cues that tell you what the motivator is for someone. And you try to work with the person around those things, and you find if you can find a little motivation, it's easier to kickstart the whole thing. and that just, I mean, that really in my situation anyway, just depends on the person in front of me.

Everybody's a little bit different in what motivates them. But you know, I'll get people that come in and they're like, oh my God, you know, I've got teenagers and I am, I'm so unhealthy and I wanna see my grandkids, and they're motivated by that. So you find those little things that kind of just tug at their heartstrings or, you know, get them really thinking about their future in a different way and knowing that their future can be different than they originally thought.

They're like, oh, I'm just genetically predisposed everybody in my family's fat. Everybody has diabetes. And I'm like, your family has habits. You know, do some of us have genetic predispositions to things? Of course, but most of the time it's bad habits that run in families, not bad genetics.

And so you kind of reframe it for people and they're like, oh, you're right. Everybody in my family eats fast food and goes to bed at 2:00 AM and right. And they start thinking about things in a different way, which is helpful.

Michael Unbroken: Yeah. Habits, I mean, that's spot on. I wish somebody would've told me that when I had started my health journey because I, I didn't, and this is actually the same reason why I always tell people, I encourage them to get a coach before a therapist for mental health because so much of it is habitual so much of it is like, how do you start to create a shift in change in the way that you navigate the world in the day to day? But it's, it's hard because it's so ingrained in you. It's so built into you to like live a certain way. and it's also, in part, it's an identity shift because you have to go, I always tell my clients, you should treat yourself like someone who gives a shit about themselves.

And that's such a, a mind-blowing moment for so many people because they never think that way. Is that something that you see too?

Kimberly Verbeke: Absolutely. I mean, I'm a pretty straightforward person and I have literally said to people, um, I had someone that I was working with that was type two diabetic insulin dependent, wanted to get off insulin and kind of had some excuses around why he was where he was yeah, no. I said, you are in the situation you're in because you've treated your body like it's a garbage can. Would you let somebody else treat your body that way? And I know that sounds really harsh, but sometimes you have to say things to people in a way that they get a visual. And it's kind of a holy sh*t. I wouldn't let somebody else treat me this way, but yet I'm treating myself this way. This makes Right. So, so if you can say things in a way that gets somebody to picture things different, look at things different, that can be part of the shift.

Michael Unbroken: Yeah. And it has to be, because it all begins with the mindset, right? Because what I've discovered over the years, having coached thousands and thousands of people and all the episodes of this podcast that we've done, it really does come down to this idea of like, how do you choose to treat yourself? And, and I think that there's a misnomer around self-care, where it's like self-care is, and I'm not saying sometimes this isn't self-care, but you see a lot of this idea of self-care is like, well, buy the chocolates. Take a bath, have a bottle of wine, watch TV all night and tomorrow it'll be better. And it's like, actually what you're really doing is you're setting yourself up for failure for tomorrow. and I think that it's difficult because people want to, we have so much of this conversation in mental health right now around the idea of being present. And I think people forget about the future. And it's like you, you're looking at this idea about quality of life and living better, but everything that you do to today directly impacts that future.

Kimberly Verbeke: I tell people all the time, like the food you're putting in your mouth, it's driving you towards disease or it's driving you towards health. You choose, it's completely up to you the relationships that you stay in. If they're healthy relationships, they're driving you towards health. If they're toxic relationships, they're driving you towards disease. There are so many things. If we could think about it from that perspective.

Michael Unbroken: Yeah. It does. And so much of that starts with like caring for yourself. So let's say some people, they're, they're leveraging that, they're like, okay, I'm hearing this. This isn't the first time I heard it. Okay, I'm gonna start doing a couple things, right? But I'm in real rough shape. My body is destroyed, my health is destroyed. My mental health has destroyed. I wanna do one thing at a time. I'm willing to like start this journey. Mm-hmm. What are some things that people need to bring their attention and their awareness to as they're like walking down this path to health?

Kimberly Verbeke: I think in terms of food, 'cause food's always a big thing. People ask me about what diet should I be on? How should I eat? And everybody treats their diet like it's a religion, and I'm like, eh, you know, no, eat in, eat in a way that, that, that, that is good for your body and that can change as you age. You know what, what works for you when you're 20 might not work for you when you're 50.

But the biggest thing I would say, if you're making shifts with food, make sure you're getting enough protein. It's going to, we need amino acids for every single action and reaction in our body. We don't just need enough protein to maintain our lead and body mass. We also need a savings account of amino acids if we get sick or injured so that we can repair.

Most people don't eat enough protein to maintain their lean body mass, much less have an insurance policy or a savings account, right? And we saw that with Covid. We saw people that there was no savings account and they were sick, sick, sick. So that's big thing. And not just from an, from a position of maintaining lean body mass, but if you're eating enough protein, you're much more likely to stabilize your blood sugar, when you have good metabolic health, everything gets better in your body. When you have blood sugar that's outta control, you have this thick, sticky blood, probably have hypertension, probably have fatty liver, probably have heart disease. I mean, it's just the snowball that gets bigger and bigger as it flies down the hill.

Michael Unbroken: Yeah. when we're looking at this, right. So obviously a big part of what you do with your company, and I want you to talk about this a little bit, is that you really help people understand the educational side of things, but also like you help them understand how to like, look at their body from like a real perspective.

One of the things that drives me fucking crazy is that, and this was my experience and I'll speak for myself mm-hmm. I would get these labs back and I'd look at them and it just, it wouldn't take hold. Yeah. It was like, I was so disconnected from the, the seriousness of it. and I think that most people don't create change until it's either too late or it's so far gone that you're only gonna get back so much of, of what you've lost. When you're working with people, walk us through the process. Where does the journey begin with you? What are the conversations that you're having and, and how do you help people really elaborate, really actually understand the potential direness of what's in front of them?

Kimberly Verbeke: Yeah, I mean, I spend about an hour and a half with people the first time I see them, and really go through kind of health history problems or, illnesses that they're experiencing. Things that they've struggled with, you know, maybe since childhood, who knows? But get a real strong health history and find out what, what are their goals, what do they wanna do? Because that's important. I don't wanna have a goal for them that they don't have, because then we're not aligned.

So I find out what their goals are and then, we'll look at labs, um, pretty extensive labs, sometimes other testing. And I try to, when we get that back, I spend a lot of time helping people understand what caused those imbalances and how they can fix it. Because I, I really do believe that knowledge is power and, and the more you know and understand about how your body functions, you feel like you have more control over fixing things.

So then, you know, go through that and then say, okay, let's create a plan to help you. Get on track and fill your best because my goal, the analogy I always use with people is let's tighten the wheels up before they fall off because it's a lot more work when they fall off.

Michael Unbroken: Yeah, it definitely is. And I'll tell you this 'cause I know there's so many people they're just even scared to go get the lab. Yeah. Scared to have the conversation. I think maybe they, they consciously know they're in pretty rough shape right now. One of the things that I recognized in my own journey was that I was treating myself in the way that I'd been taught was okay.

And for many of the people who are listening to this, they come from these very volatile backgrounds. And so it's been embedded in them to a lot of extent that it's okay not to take care of yourself. They've never had witness to it, they've never seen other people take care of themselves.

And so it becomes this very foreign concept where they're like, I don't even wanna start this 'cause I'm scared. Yeah. Like where's the conversation that you have with people when they first come in about like the mental game that this health journey can be?

Kimberly Verbeke: I mean, I get that on a regular basis. People are like, oh my gosh, I'm petrified to get my test results. And I'm like, no, it's just information. That's it. It's just information. So if you can take a step back and try to kind of pull some emotion out of it and go, it's just information. And when I have information, then I can do something about, right.

I can manage what I've measured. again, just trying to help them reframe the way they think about things, because bearing your head in the sand isn't really a strategy. I mean, when you're, you know, laying on a gurney and somebody's pumping your heart after you've had a heart attack, I don't think anybody wants to be there.

that's not a nice place to be. And those are the places you end up when you just put on blinders. when you can get people to go, you know, I may have spent some time mistreating my body, but I have the power to change that. And I have the power to care for myself. Like, I would care for someone I love, I want to take care of myself because, you know, most people want to be there for their kids or their partner or, you know, whoever they, they care about.

And when you can think about things from that perspective of, I can't pour from an empty cup if I'm sick, I can't take care of people that I care about, but if I take care of myself, I have bigger bandwidth, I can do more. so, you know, I think a lot of things around health are changing the way people think about things.

Michael Unbroken: Yeah, and getting to this place of actually allowing, here's what was mind blowing for me. I was like, oh, you're allowed to take care of yourself.

Kimberly Verbeke: Yeah, it's not a luxury to take care of yourself, it's necessity.

Michael Unbroken: It's also pain in the ass. Right? Because what is, I mean, anyone can argue with me on this, but like, what is more delicious than like brownies and chocolate cake and beer and pizza and all the things, and it's like, I'm not so dogmatic that I won't experience those things 'cause I'm a human, but it's like, yeah, I'm with you. It's like navigating that relationship with yourself about what you're putting into your body matters. Because what I think is people get so used to feeling like shit.

Kimberly Verbeke: You nailed it right there. I was just gonna bring something up. So my daughter, who's 24, she and I talk about this. She's like, you never eat junk food. You don't eat a lot of sweets. And I'm like, I don't like the way sugar makes me feel. And I've reached a point in my life where I'm able to stop and think about how something makes me feel before I eat it. And I know this might sound silly, it works for me. I literally will stop and go, eh, if I eat that, I'm gonna get a stomach ache, or I'll feel super sluggish and tired.

Nah, let me have a bite. Okay. That's good. I'm done. I also am not dogmatic. Like I freaking love pizza. I eat pizza sometimes 'cause it's delicious and it makes my life better. I don't eat it every day. Right. So we think if we can, I think one of the big, big problems in American culture is just my opinion.

We are so excessive, and I learned this when I was 21 and went to Switzerland for the first time. And my friend and I went into a bar and there were like 15-year-old kids sitting in there, hanging out, having beers. People weren't out of control, they weren't crazy. And I thought, oh my God, if there were 15-year-olds in an American bar, it would be insane.

And I just like saw like, it was like, oh my God, they're not excessive. But Americans are so excessive. Like we go from. You know, one end of the spectrum to another. And, and alcohol's a perfect place to talk about that. So, like, you know, people tend to be very, very excessive with alcohol. And now the pendulum has swung the other way.

And everybody kind of in my space, demonizes alcohol. And I'm just gonna tell you my perspective, alcohol's been around for a long time. If you look at most of the areas of the world with a lot of centurions, minus the Mormons, most of those people drink alcohol every day. But you know what they don't do?

They don't drink it in excess. They drink a little bit with people they love, they're having a wonderful time, they're eating good food. It's not excessive. So I think a lot of nuances kind of, there's nuances around excess and around how much and how often, and, it's real easy to. Just say something super bad when people have a hard time controlling the amount.

Michael Unbroken: Yeah. The excess is true. My favorite breakfast when I was in my twenties was like four or five. I'm not joking. Four or five pieces of chocolate cake and like milk, you know? And like that's such a crazy thing as I realized, like I've battled a lot of addictions in my life. But I don't think any of them were more difficult than the food.

And it's funny 'cause I was having a conversation with one of my little brothers who, he went on this amazing health transformation and he lost like me a hundred plus pounds and he is like really taking care of himself, quit smoking, quit drinking, and we were having this conversation, I'm sure he wouldn't mind me bringing this up, but like his biggest thing was like sugar. And that was my biggest thing too, where I was like, oh my God, the high feels so good. But then the low feels so bad. And it's crazy. 'cause like when I worked in corporate America before, I was like, I have to go on this entrepreneurial journey. Now, 16 years ago, it wasn't uncommon that it's donuts in the lunch, in the break room, pizza for the special events, so on and so forth.

And it's like, it's oddly reinforced. So now we have the sedentary lifestyle, we have these bad foods. But then I think part of the problem, Kimberly, is that so many people can justify this because they say, I don't have time. And they're like, I don't have time to eat healthy. I don't have time to go to the gym. I don't have time to go to the walk. I don't have time to do all the things. is that excessive too? Is that a part of the problem that you're seeing?

Kimberly Verbeke: Well, yeah, of course. I mean, I remember when I was before I had my daughter and people were like, oh, you're so lucky you have time to work out. And I'm like, oh, well cool.

I don't watch three hours of TV at night like you do. You know, let's just call it what it is. Mm-hmm. And then they're like, well wait till you have kids. You won't have as much time. No, I'll prioritize it. And I did. And I think all of us, we make time for the things that are important to us, and maybe the amount of time changes.

Maybe what you do changes, right? You make concessions based on different chapters of your life, but you don't just give something up because it's not convenient, right? And so I think if we can, um, you know, be willing to change or be willing to be adaptable to, to situations and not so like, oh, it's gotta be just this one way.

You can make, you can figure anything out and make it work and make, make it be successful for you at the, point you're at in your life. And you can still have a piece of chocolate cake sometimes.

Michael Unbroken: Totally. Yeah. I've got a couple friends who are the, these health experts, you probably know many of their names. And I'm like, I don't understand how these guys, this seems to me they have no joy in their life. Now, they would probably argue differently, but I look at it, I go, dude, you haven't had anything that is like sensory pleasing in five years. Yes. I don't relate to that.

Kimberly Verbeke: No, I totally agree with you. I mean, I'll have someone come in and they're like, well, I gave up gluten, I gave up alcohol, I gave up dairy. And I'm like, so you're telling me there's no joy in your life? And we'll like laugh about it, but. People be, this is, goes back to Americans we're so excessive, it's all or nothing. And I'm like, no, I truly believe health is somewhere in the middle. There's middle ground, right? You're 80% of the time you're doing things that are very healthy. But if you're a fairly healthy person, you've got some, some leeway 20% of the time, and you can have chocolate cake and you can have a glass of wine and you can have a piece of pizza because it's not the main part of your diet every day.

Michael Unbroken: Let's talk about stress here 'cause I think it's a, a really important factor that we need to look at when we're talking about longevity.

What are the things that are happening in our lives that are stressed, that are good versus what are bad and how is that impacting our longevity and our aging?

Kimberly Verbeke: Yeah. So I think, stress is something that has gotten a little bit of a bad rap, right? Oh, all stress is bad. Well, no, that's not true. We need hormetic stress. So when you go to the gym, that's stress and that is hormesis. It makes you stronger. Stress that makes you stronger, that's important. If you never have any stress, you'll get weak. But what's bad is when you wake up every morning and you go to a job you hate, and you come home to a relationship where you don't get along with the person and all you do is fuss and argue.

And so you self-medicate with five pieces of chocolate cake and six beers that stress, that stress, that your body cannot handle day after day after day after day. And so getting people to understand that. Here's an example was working with someone, a young guy, 39 years old, has a job where he works night shifts in a massive amount of exposure to electromagnetic fields in his job.

And he's very, very, very sick. And he's like, yeah, but my job pays so much money. And I said, okay, you're probably gonna have to choose, do you want the money or do you want your health because your body is not holding up to what's happening. And, getting people to understand that there are just some stresses that some, some people, your body tells you if it likes what's going on or not. It gives you information you might not like the information it gives you, but it's constantly giving you feedback. And so paying attention to that feedback is super important if you want a high quality of life.

Michael Unbroken: What I wanna look at here, so we're on this path, I think we've laid a lot of foundation. I think we're looking at some ways that people can start to take consideration of themselves, understand a little bit of the mindset, understand some of the habits and behaviors, understand some of the stress. When you think about aging well, like how does one age well, like how does one set themself up for success? I mean, inevitably we're all gonna die. I mean, there's no way around that. There's this amazing YouTube show I watch I think it's literally called like Last Meal. And at the intro of the show, he goes, we all have two things in common. We're all gonna die and we all have to eat. And I always thought like, ah, that's super true.

We all have that in common no matter what. Yeah, I think there's levels to death. Obviously, there's accidents and that's unfortunate and that's a part of it. But there's also, I think. Is there a help? I don't wanna phrase this. Is there a healthy way to die?

Kimberly Verbeke: Yeah, absolutely.

Michael Unbroken: Okay, let's talk about that.

Kimberly Verbeke: I'm gonna tell you one of my favorite things. I have a lady that's 70, I think she's 79 this year. She's a tiny little spitfire. And you know what she said to me the first time she came to see me? I want you to help me 'cause I wanna die standing up. And I'm like, I wanna be her. Right? So what does it mean to me to die a good death or to age? Well, right?

Yes, we're all gonna die, but we don't all die the same way. I can tell you that from experience, my, my idea of dying a good death. I'll give you my grandfather, my mom's dad as an example. He died in his late nineties and he was very, very healthy until probably about the last year of his life. He had a pretty bad car accident that banged him up pretty bad up until that point, I mean, he was in his nineties and he loved to fix stuff and tinker. He would pick up a washer and put it on the back of his truck and people were like, how old is he? So there's a couple of things that I've seen older people do that have what I would think of as successful outcomes.

If you want to be able to do something when you're older, you have to continue doing it. When we stop doing things, we stop being able to do things. So don't stop jumping. Don't stop running. Don't stop. Right? Bending down and picking things up. You know, people are like, oh, that's heavy. I probably shouldn't pick that up. No, you should. You should pick it up. you have to continue doing things. Does it change to some degree? Sure. You know, maybe you're not, I don't know, max and doing your one rep max at 90, but you're still lifting heavy weight. You're still creating that hormetic stress that keeps your body strong. So for me aging well, like I think about success, like I wanna be in my nineties and, and be able to play with, I don't know, maybe would it be my great-grandchildren by then?

Maybe I wanna have a sharp mind and be witty and fun to be around. Not like some crotchety, cranky old person that has just hasn't had no purpose for the last 20 years. And I think purpose is another thing that gives us quality of life as we age. I think, you know, people sometimes retire and don't have something that gives them a purpose and, and they really fall into a lot of unhappiness because purpose is a huge driver for us.

Michael Unbroken: Yes, I agree with that and I have conversations with friends. I've come to find most of my friends are entrepreneurs because we all kind of have the same mindset. Yeah. Where it's like, we're gonna work till we die. Like, I don't, yes. I see no retirement in my future. It seems unnecessary to me.

You know? I agree. And I think that I think there's this is American culture. I think at its finest, there is this heavy, looming cloud that sits over this society about the concept and idea of prepare for retirement, save all of your money. You'll travel when you're old, you'll do that when you're old, you'll do that.

And I'm like, you're probably not going to, let's be very clear. And they have, the average person in this country has about $400 in savings. And it's like, so you, you add that level of stress plus this idea of retirement now not having purpose, and it's just like you are stress bombed over and over and over again about the thing that you don't know that's gonna happen or when it's gonna happen.

I think often people forget to live and they walk down this path where it's like, well, at least I have the relationship, even though it sucks. At least I have the job, even though it sucks. At least I have this, even though it sucks. And I'm like, you have to actually give yourself the thing that you want because this is my belief, you got one life. This is only gonna happen one time. I mean, I could be wrong. And I'll go out on the other side of it and they'll be like, boom, reincarnation, here you are. You're this other guy. I don't know. You don't know. But even if that were true, you wouldn't fucking remember it anyway.

What I do believe is like, okay, if the truth is that the time is now, and this is our opportunity to live and to create change, why would you not want to do what is in your best interest to create a healthy, fulfilling life? Because plus the way things are going, people probably aren't gonna have any retirement in America anyway, social security probably will be gone. You're gonna be in this position where you know you have to be able and capable as you head into that final stretch.

Kimberly Verbeke: And the other thing that people don't think about is the average American retires at 64 and dies at 76. You got a few freaking years. And to top that off most of those years are usually spent sick.  Come on. Like we can do better. We are a first world country. We should be ashamed. Right? We are 4% of the world's population and we consume almost 70% of the world's pharmaceuticals. What the hell?

Michael Unbroken: Yeah.

Kimberly Verbeke: We have a lot of power to make significant changes that can give us really phenomenal outcomes. This isn't about not dying, it's about going out in a way that you have some control over it. Right. You're not having someone change your diaper and spoon feed you. 'cause I'm not interested in that. I know what that looks like and it's ugly.

Michael Unbroken: Yeah. I think, unfortunate, you were exposed to it from a working perspective. I was exposed to it from a family perspective, and it was just like, I don't want this. Like, I quit drinking, I quit smoking, I quit partying. I even though I still have insomnia at something I'm working on, like, I really was like, I've gotta figure out this frame to health. And maybe I'm excessive at times 'cause that's probably my nature. And societally you're American. And I'm always looking at like, optimization. Yeah. And while I obviously don't have control of the end, I think to myself, this is my ideal death, right? Because I'm like, I believe that whatever we put into the universe comes to us. Right? My ideal death is like 85 years old in my sleep. Just calm and peace. Like at my lake house, in my bed with just like the calmest, like, I just don't even wanna feel it. I mean, I think to myself, man, I've suffered so much, that would be really, really, really ideal to me. It is a weird question. I never asked anybody question like this before. Is there a way to I don't, this is so asinine. Is there a way to create your ideal death?

Kimberly Verbeke: I mean, from my perspective, you've got a way better chance of creating your ideal death if you live a high-quality life. Doesn't that make sense? I mean, if you're in complete disrepair, you're gonna suffer.

You and I both know that. We've both seen that, and I'm not interested in that. Anything that I can do to, you know, create the outcome I want, I'm gonna do that. I'm motivated to do that. and I think that by maintaining my health. I've got a way bigger chance of dying. Standing up.

Michael Unbroken: Totally. Yeah. Right. I think that part of me is like, you kind of deserve it in a lot of ways. It's like, why not? If we have the space to age better, to increase our quality of life, to ultimately have this experience that feels more human, like, I sometimes look at what's happening in the world and it feels inhumane.

Like the idea that is, would be you would be on like 10 prescriptions. Makes no sense to me. I have gotten in trouble for saying this from people on the internet. I don't particularly care, so I'll say it again, but like, there's almost no reason you should be on the vast majority of prescription drugs that you're taking and I think that you've many people have become indoctrinated by marketing which, you know, I mean, we're one of two countries in the world where you can show pharmaceutical commercials on television. You walk into the doctor's office, you get four minutes with them, followed by.

Here's nine prescriptions. What's honest walking down a holistic path with people like you can really cost money. People don't have it. We're in a bitter, bitter turmoil financially in this country, and it might get worse or better. We don't know what's gonna happen. And I think that fear tends to drive a lot of people's decisions and they miss out on what I think being the cornerstone of much of this experience, which is peace. I think fear drives people, shame drives people. Uh, lack of education drives people. And my hope is that they'll listen to this and just recognize that they are way more in control than they think they are.

Kimberly Verbeke: Absolutely. Way more.

Michael Unbroken: How do you give people permission to do that? To accept that, to acknowledge it, and to leverage it? Because I feel like, and I stand by what I said, I just feel like people don't feel like they're in control. So how do we give them permission to be in more control?

Kimberly Verbeke: I think a lot of it is around education. You know, my husband and I have this conversation. We've had it many, many times. He's 12 years older than me. He did not grow up in a health focused family at all. Very traditional, lots of fast food. you know, water was like something you only drank if, I don't know, there was nothing else to drink. You know, all that kinda stuff. And he always says to me, I think you think people just know this stuff and they don't.

So I try really hard to educate people. You have the power. And I'll go back to what you said earlier while someone may not have been raised with this education, we now have the internet at our fingertips. If you want information, you can find it. There is so much stuff out there for free that can change your life. my Instagram, I really spend very little time promoting anything on. My Instagram, it's primarily I use it to try to educate people because I want to put something out in the world that helps people because I care about humans and I want humans to have a great experience while they're here in a great quality of life.

Michael Unbroken: Yeah.

Kimberly Verbeke: So I think if you're willing to make changes and understand that you didn't get broken overnight, you're not gonna get fixed overnight. You gotta have some patience with yourself, but you also gotta have a little gravel in your gut, and you gotta be willing to keep going when it's uncomfortable or it doesn't feel like what you wanna do. Right. 'cause that's a problem in our society. Do what makes you feel good. Well, good luck with that.

Michael Unbroken: Yeah. We're a weak society. There's just no way around it. And I know that pisses people off to hear, but it's just true. Angela Duckworth wrote this book called Grit like a decade ago or so, and I loved it because she was able to point just reality of success for most people was the path of resistance.

Yeah. Not the path of least resistance. It was the path of discipline. It was the path of honesty, it was the path of accountability. It was the path of like doing the thing you don't want to do anyway. And one of the things that, so I had this massive. Rock bottom moment. I was 25 heading into 26, and again, you know, 3 52 packs a day, drinking myself for sleep.

And I remember I looked in the mirror and I was like, this is your fault. Mm-hmm. Like you did. Yes. There's childhood trauma. Yes. There's abuse. There's all those things which is reasonable. And by the way, I would say this, I'm not taking anyone excuse excuses from them. Your excuses are incredibly valid. Like they are. What does that have to do with anything? And, and I remember having this moment, I went to war with myself. There's no two ways about it. It was not a nice moment by any scope of the imagination. And on the backside of that, I landed at this really, like, this motto of my life, which is no excuses, just results.

And what that's allowed me to do is to create the life that I have 'cause people will come to me and they're like, dude, how have you traveled the world? You've written four books. You've been on billboards in Times Square, you have amazing relationships, friendships, your family unit is all these things.

I'm like, 'cause I stopped making fucking excuses. Yeah. And that's what want to encourage people here. It also requires an amount of patience that I cannot even begin to dictate to you. And I think that whoever initially came up with patience as a virtue should be hanged in the public square 'cause it's not, it is a skill. It is a craft. Yes. And it is a requirement to success. Absolutely. And my hope is like people recognize, we're not talking about an overnight shift here.

Kimberly Verbeke: Nope.

Michael Unbroken: We're talking about a lifestyle shift.

Kimberly Verbeke: It's progress, not perfection. I always tell people healing is not a linear path.

It's not this straight line forward. You're gonna have, you know, maybe a parent passes away or a child gets sick or you lose a job or you go through a divorce. Those things impact our health. But you keep plugging away, right? You stay the course. And I have yet to meet anyone that has really put effort into turning their health around.

Nobody ever comes to me and goes, man, I wish I wouldn't have done that. People are, are often will come back and go. This has changed my entire life. Every part of my life has changed because I'm healthier, I have healthier relationships, I have a better outlook. I am now have a job I love because everything starts to shift, right, because your mindset has shifted.

Michael Unbroken: My mentor, I know this isn't his quote, but he has said it to me countless times. Sick man only has one wish, and it's health. And this is the foundation of everything. And when you're willing to put yourself first before the kids, before the relationship, before the career, I mean really like audit your time.

You know, it's if your phone is like, Hey, you're on Instagram 36 hours this week. You got a problem, right? You have a real problem. So I think that the self-accountability narrative that's missing in our culture is also the very thing that's going to create transformation in your life. There's just no way around it.

And then there's a side of it where you have education and support where people like you and like I come together to help you on your path 'cause I'll tell you this, until I had a coach, until I had therapist, until I had accountability, nothing really shifted. There were micro shifts, there were little moments of difference.

But it wasn't until I was a part of and, and invested into something bigger than me to, to change really happen. And so I'm curious if somebody wants to find out more about you, about the company, about working with you, about creating these shifts. They're hearing this, they're like, I need help. How can they find you and tell them a little bit more about what you do with them?

Kimberly Verbeke: I mean, my goal is always to help people optimize their health so they can live a really high quality of life. I love helping people around longevity. I do a 12-month longevity protocol that's just super fun. It's based on 40 plus years of clinical research. you can find me through my website.

It's easy way to connect with me. That is avitawellness.com. I am pretty active on Instagram and my handle there at is Kimberly Verbeke Wellness, both of those places are great places to connect with me. I do all my social media, so if you reach out to me, I will be the person responding to you, not someone else.

I really, really enjoy working with people. I believe all of us were given a gift, and I believe that my gift is to help people. I've seen some real suffering in my life, and my goal is to help people so that they don't have to experience that, and they can just they can go out standing up or laying in their lakehouse bed and go, you know what? That was good. I'm out.

Michael Unbroken: Yeah. Yeah. My hope is that people will reach out to you, that they'll connect with you. I know that you have a ton of resources on your website. You even have some programs that people can do, and I just think education is at the forefront of any of these shifts, and it just.

If you are like, Hey, I want to create change in my life. And you've been unsure about how this is a great opportunity for you to learn more. My last question for you, my friend, what does it mean to you to be unbroken?

Kimberly Verbeke: You know, I would say that things happen to everyone in life. We all have things that make us feel broken. I think the beauty is in, in being able to, you know, know that you can heal from those things. Some things that we experience leave a scar on us, but I've always looked at anything really hard that's ever happened in my life and I go, how can I use this as a stepping stone instead of a stumbling block? How can I help someone else through what I've experienced? And so I think often it's our perspective about what we go through. We can choose to be a victim or we can choose to go, you know what, what that person did was really shitty and I didn't deserve it, but also I'm gonna be better because of it.

Michael Unbroken: Yeah. That's powerful. And I think the same way. And you know, it always comes back to how is life happening for me and not to me. My friend, thank you so much for being here.

Unbroken Nation, thank you so much for listening. If this impacted you in any way, please share it with a friend because you may help them create transformation in their life as well. Take care of yourselves, take care of each other.

And Until Next Time.

Be Unbroken.

I'll See Ya.