Overcoming Challenges and Embracing Success in life | with Jerome Maldonado

Michael: Hey, what's up Unbroken Nation? Hope that you're doing well wherever you are in the world today. Very excited to be back with you with another episode with my friend Jerome Maldonado. What's up brother? How are you bro?

Jerome: Good to be here, man. I'm so excited to have you. Thank you so much.

Michael: Yeah, we connected in happenstance for a whack of a better way to phrase it, where you're like eating a sandwich and I'm eating a sandwich and we're at this event and we just connect and everyone at the event is going and doing their thing and for like two hours we're just like walking around having a conversation, it was like kindred spirits in some kind of weird way. So, I'm really excited to have you on this show and, and get to introduce you to the audience here. What's something that I need to know about your past to understand who you are today?

Jerome: I think a lot of who I'm built on comes from a little bit of pain that I suffered as a kid, not from my parents, my story's a lot different than yours and some other people, but I think a lot of people can relate to this. I was dyslexic as a kid and didn't know until I was in college, but in first grade I had reading issues and I went to a private school and I was ridiculed because of it, not by kids, but by teachers, and I was held back by it. And I always had the same inferiority complex about myself from the time I was in first grade and I saw the principal, the teacher who was a nun, and my mom negotiated what grade I was gonna go to in second grade or stayed in first grade. And from that point forward, I always felt like I had something to prove in order to get to the next level and anything I did in life but I had one thing that helped me through that and it was a strong mom. They kept my confidence up, but I always felt like, you know, there, it was a private school study called special education, but in terms of no other better word, it was a special education program where I was pulled outta class every day my whole life, all the way till eighth grade to go read with less than average kids. And so, one of the big things is I could have depicted my life in that regards, and it's for a certain amount of time I did, and that you were lesser? I felt like less, less of a person inadequate to my peers because I couldn't read as fast as them, it actually put me in a position where at a young age I became a little bit more aggressive because, I'd rather throw a spit one in class or do something that would get me in trouble or get put in a corner as opposed to read in front of a group  because I did, the other kids would shout out the words that I couldn't read fast enough and it made me feel inferior to them. And the teachers didn't help because, you know, you think you're doing this private Catholic school looking back that they would help you, right. And he wasn't like that all the way through school. There was a few good teachers that are memorable but the vast majority of 'em just didn't want you as a problem. So, they would get rid of, they would dismiss you as opposed to helping me. And so I think that's an important piece of my life that only talk about to a lot of people but really sculpts, it sculpted me to who I am today and what I felt was a negative attribute as a child which actually has become a positive attribute in who I am today. And I still carry some of that with me now, I think as adults there's a lot of adults that carry that with them. I know 'cause even with as much success as I've had, there's moments in my life when I say there's moments, because now as I've grown, it's easier for me to overcome it by telling myself that none of the inadequacies really add up to who I really am. But yet they still live deep within me. And I still, there's moments in time where I feel that inferiority that I felt as a kid today at almost 50 years old.

Michael: Yeah. And it's almost impossible not to, you know, we are the sum total of all of our human experiences. And the hard part about it too is like when you're a child and you're at that age and you need compassion and empathy, love and care, especially from teachers, the space where you're at in the most, your parents, your peers, you're in this developmental state, it's like you guys don't understand that I'm struggling here. And you think that it, like what I ran into my brain does not math. If you're like, what is two plus two? I'm like 312 because like and I'll sit there and look at numbers and is my biggest struggle and I had this teacher in high school and she would ridicule me in front of kids. She'd be like, you're not trying and I'm like, I cannot explain to you the fact that my brain cannot function, that I do not understand what you're talking about. And then like you talk about this thing about inadequacy, it really kind of seeps at you.

Jerome: Yeah, that was me with reading and math was my thing like I could do math, but for the life of me reading anything that had to do with read, so it wasn't just reading, it was in reading comprehension, anything comprehension. So it have, you know, with social studies, social sciences, sciences it had to do with English, it had to do with any of that stuff. So like math was the only thing I was good at, you know, everything else suffered.

Michael: Which is my complete opposite, which is really funny. And so, when you're in that, and as a kid and, and you mentioned like you even feel some ramifications now, adding 50 years old, it's like, how do you navigate the world? When there's this thing that you have no control over that actually is controlling everything around you, like you, you talked about violent outbursts. You talked about being, you know, getting in trouble so you didn't have to read. How'd that play out? Like when you're in your teens and in your twenties and thirties, like what role did those experiences play in your adult life?

Jerome: You know, I think if it would've went from there to my thirties it would've been catastrophic in life. God puts people in your life at the right time. If you allow, kind of like what you talked about, like when we talked for almost two hours the other day, the rest of who was there for me, no one else was there. We got so deep in conversation that no one else really mattered, I think that God kind of brought us together for whatever reason, you know. And you're the one that mattered that day in the relationship in life I think that God puts the right people in life if you allow him to and you embrace 'em. There's a few people, there was a woman by the name of Ms. McCullough and she wouldn't even know this, I don't think I would wish that at some point in time I'd be able to find her, I don't know her first name. I never have. 'cause she was just this McCullough, right. But her impact on my life was strong because she believed in me. My mom was a huge impact in my life because she never gave up on me and she believed in me when I needed her. In seventh grade, I actually got kicked out of the private school I was in and my mom went to every single private school in town and nobody wanted me and my mom wanted me to go to a private high school, they didn't have a wrestling team and this one nun at our school called Holy Ghost, took me in and she embraced me and she sat me down and her name was Sister Ada. And she sat and said, Jerome, I want to know what happened in a nutshell, basically. And then I kind of gave her a rundown and she was, I believe you're a good kid 'cause I believe that no kid is bad, right? And she goes, and I want you to work with. And I even get a little emotional with some of that stuff because it's people like that at the right time that have belief in you that make milestones of changing your life, which I'm sure you've had in your life at the right times.

And it was her that day sitting there with me and her just looking at me saying, I believed in you that changed where I was going, always in trouble. In seventh grade to going into eighth grade, I didn't want to disappoint. I think God put her specifically in my life at that moment to change my direction and 'cause I could have went down a really bad road 'cause I was fighting and I was real aggressive and most of it was because I felt very inadequate what I was doing 'cause everybody made me feel that way. And I was just a kid and I didn't know, you know, I didn't know at that time I felt like I was to blame for everything, you know, that everything that went wrong. And when I look at it now, like at my kids, I just, when I became a father, I wanted to make sure my kids never felt like that. And so that was a real or peace for me being a dad and it was like those people that were putting my life, that me, catastrophic changes for me, it could have been a catastrophic exchange, but made really positive impacts on me in such a major way that really shifted my life.

Me not wanting to let her down, shifted who I was I worked hard at being the best Jerome, Jerome could be my eighth grade year 'cause I was still a dumb kid with dumb tendencies. But a good kid, my intentions weren't ill and bad, I just was placed to that.

So, I was like, okay, well I'm gonna be in trouble for everything I do I'll just, I may as well do some stuff that I shouldn't be doing. Right. And you think like that as a kid, you know? And so, they choose put my life and then that led me into high school, and it was sports and athletics that kept me driving in that direction. And so, my coaches, the people that were coaching me and not letting them down my peers that believed in me, my goals, I started having goals. So, I felt like when I went to a public high school in ninth grade, I was like, I wasn't the dumb kid anymore. I was like the kid that was like above average at that point in time. I didn't know that because I never felt that feeling before. So that little win in my life in ninth grade was huge for me because I was like, damn, I'm not the dumb kid in class anymore. I'm like, I can par up with these people. So, I think that a lot of it is God putting you the right, you in the right place at the right time, giving you the right circumstances. I think sometimes people don't embrace it and don't gravitate to it and the bright people at the right time will be presented to you. And I really believe that because my whole life has went in that direction and I've allowed some of those people at the right times to come in where it's made major changes in the direction of my life.

Michael: That's so powerful, man. I can trace through so many experiences of not only my childhood, but even in today where it's like the right people just keep coming into my life. And it wasn't always like that obviously, this audience knows my story, you know, my story and for a long time I hated people that would be the understatement of the century. Right? I just hated other humans so desperately, all the pain, all the hurt, all the suffering, all the times where I was taught down to or belittled or told you don't matter or you're a loser but there was kind of always just like that one shining star like this Ms. McColey you said, that you had and I had that in Mr. Hollingsworth and Mr. Bush, these amazing teachers. And then I've had it since with. Amazing mentors, some of who are like literal mentors and some are friends and men like you and Tom Bilyeu and David Meltzer and other friends. And periodically it's just like, Man, all these things just kind of happen where I just kept being open to it. I think one of the things that's really difficult when you come through those experiences, 'cause that's traumatic, I mean, obviously you're emotional about it, it carries weight with you even into adulthood, which is what I'm always trying to explain to my clients. I'm like, just 'cause you're here doesn't mean this is over but it's like, I believe this, and this has been probably one of the hardest things I've learned personally. If you're willing to just allow the space to trust people, most of the time they're not gonna let you down.

Jerome: Yeah, and I believe in that. You know, I think that most people genuinely are good.

Michael: I agree.

Jerome: I've met more good people Instagram won't tell you that though. But social media won't tell you that, they condemn you for the smallest things and then there's a lot of haters out there. And I think that those haters are really their own, their bleeding in internally, in their own problems and traumatic issues that they have in their lives. And you know, like that stuff made me stronger, you know, these people go through this stuff and their solution to their pain is having another people feel pain.

One of the biggest things that I think, I've learned over the course of time is when I get people around me that are doing well and I run my businesses like this I'm hard on them, I'm hard on people. I mean, I'm very critical of them and part of that is because I'm so hard on myself, 'cause of what I went through, I think and I'm hard on people so much so that sometimes it breaks them before it lifts them up. And I try to make it a point to not be so critical on them that it breaks them before it lifts them up.

One thing that I've had to work at is against this employer is trying to be critical enough where it helps them grow, but not break them and then help them tally up to what their true potential is because I think that so many people live with so many inner demons, all different alite, you know, from different upbringings and different circumstances that what my pains have brought me has allowed me to be able to help in other people. And it's been cool, you know, we hopefully as an end result, I'll hope help more people in my life than, than I ever bargained for and hope they'll be able to make an impact on them. And it's not my life goal I think that some of what I went through has been able to help me make some major changes in my life, other people's lives I'm just thankful

Michael: I put myself in the accountability of most people and what I'm about to say, just become massively bitter, they just massively bitter about the world, about other people because there is so much suffering, there's a lot of hurt, there's a lot of pain, there's so much of this concept where you don't have worthiness and we seek it and like these people won't give it to us. And maybe it's our parents or our teachers or our friends or our intimate partner, and we become bitter and we become dismayed and we are melancholy and we hate the world. It's like, what do you do on those days? Right? Because in my mind, here's what I relegated it to very simply put, there's a statement that I make to myself that life is gonna life. And it's just my way of just being like, man, people are gonna suck sometimes. But we get so caught up. 'cause I guarantee it, you've had employees in someone who's ran teams for my entire adult life. You've had employees that you pushed that didn't realize like you're pushing them 'cause you see potential and they hate you, they resent.

Jerome: Yeah, 100%. And like if you don't have ill intentions, it's all out of good in your heart, you know, but you're right, I think sometimes people, and a lot of people do because I think they have a lot of pain that they went through in their lives. And to your point, I have a saying that, it's not right, it's not wrong, it just is one of my mentors taught me that. He go, look, you know, Bill, one of my mentors, he said, Jerome, there's things in life. He goes, you wanna be right or you wanna be rich. I'd rather be wrong and rich than right and broke. And he goes, some things in life aren't right they're not wrong they're just are that accept them prove what they are. And when you take on life in that under those circumstances, you realize that sometimes people just wanna be right, just let 'em be right, and sometimes them being right makes them feel more righteous in their own good. It doesn't make you less of a person, it doesn't make you less of who you are. It just allows them to up to what makes them feel better about themselves. And so that's helped me a lot in business, it's helped me a lot even on a personal basis and in accepting, you know, where you are in things. It's helped me out in business negotiations and lawsuits and everything else that comes along with business is just understanding that I can even tell my wife this and it's helped us out even raising our kids because there's been times where there's been parents or coaches, um, or other influences in our kids' lives we feel like what was happening to our kids in that moment should be happening to our kids in that moment and you get like angry 'cause you're a protective parent, right? And I have to sometimes tell my wife, I say, Hey, look, you know, I said they don't even know what they're doing, you know, like they're not doing it deliberately, they're not trying to hurt our kids, but they're hurting our kids. So we as parents have to make conscious decisions to get our kids out of a compromising situation and a toxic situation and migrate 'em out of it because it's not that it, they're right and we're wrong or right vice versa that circumstance just is as it sits, and it's how do we handle that circumstance that actually is gonna depict what the outcome is. And that's life like, that's everybody's life that's watching, that's your life, like what you did to turn your life around that's how you did it and that's how I did it. And 'cause the situation that I was in as bad as I make it sound, I had a really good childhood. But that was just something that really impacted my childhood and did the teachers think they were doing wrong at that time? No. But did they know they were affecting me in a negative way, in such a negative way that they were? No. So was it right in my eyes it wasn't, but in their eyes, they were not wrong. It just was the circumstances that I was brought up in and I had to figure out how to deal with that, it just is. And I had, it was up to me to be able to figure out life and it's up to people watching. I mean, we're all subjected to crazy circumstances, that's just life. And it's up to us to figure out like how do we, how do we acclimate to this? That it just is how do we move forward from.

Michael: One of the things that comes to mind as you're saying that is like when you, the ego has a need to be, right? Right. But the ego also has a need to be a fit. And so you're constantly in his throw of the back and forth of, you're right, or I'm right, or you're wrong, or I'm wrong. And when you get to that place, and this is again, I wanna stay on this for a moment, this concept I have of life is gonna life like you could do the worst thing in the world to me. And the thing that I'm gonna take from it is like, whatever, it’s life. And in that, that's not to be dismissive, it's not that I don't get hurt, it's not like when I left my last relationship, I was crippled by it like it totally sucked. Right? When I lose friends, when I have business go awry, when the podcast doesn't do as well as I hoped it would do, you know, and things of that nature, I just kind of go in the long run, it doesn't actually matter, what matters is this moment right here on this couch, having this conversation. The relationship with my incredible friends, with my community, getting to speak and serve, having the ability to like live life despite all the reasons why I shouldn't be here and there is the word that I go to in that is freedom. But so many people, Jerome, you know this man, they're so trapped, they're so trapped in the thing that happened in third grade.

Jerome: And I have family members like that and it's sad to me 'cause there are people that I really hold close to my heart and I love, and I wouldn't even say who you are 'cause they ever saw this podcast and I said who it was, they'd be devastated by me saying it. But it lives in close to us, it's close to everybody. You know, there's people we know, we're live there's people that are watching this, that are living it.

Michael: I agree. Why are you the outlier? What is it that you know that they don't? Because this is what I think people come to a lot as they're like, why is it that talking about myself? They'll look at me and go, how did he figure out? Right.

Jerome: You said it just a second ago. I mean, there's multiple reasons, right? There's more than just this, but there's like, one of the things that you just said that you do is really is one of the tactical ways how you overcome it. And you don't look at how it's affecting your day like if somebody tells me something negative today about me, I'm like, like, how's that really gonna affect my life tomorrow? Like, it really doesn't. Right? And I look at the future and I ask myself those questions sometimes I look at it, I go, okay, who is this person? How would they affected my life in a positive, negative way in the past? How would they affected me in a negative, positive way today? And will what they're doing and telling me to dig in, is it gonna affect my life tomorrow? And if it doesn't, if they haven't affected me and they're not affecting me and they're not going to affect my life in a positive way, why should I allow them into my life to affect me today? And none of that adds up to me moving forward in life. I disregard it a hundred percent.

Michael: Do you think that's like your superpower then?

Jerome: I think I'm blessed that I have that, and I do when I pray, sometimes I tell, I'll say like, God, thank you, by the grace of God, I go because I feel sometimes that I'm lucky that I have something because I know what's easier said and done. It's taken a lot of work and my wife's been telling me that, 'cause there's a lot of mental illness that runs in my family line, like back and I think that, and she goes, I think that you are okay with who you are because of all the self-development that you're done since I was 18 years old in entrepreneurship because I've been doing it for 30 years. And I don't, I sometimes ask myself if I'd be a different person. If I wouldn't have gotten into this entrepreneurial journey at such a young age and into personal development at such a young age, and probably 100% for sure, because. I've been working on my personal development for 30 years.

Michael: Yeah, dude, here's what I always tell people. I'm like, do you really want to find out who you are? Be an entrepreneur. Right. And like, it's funny 'cause sometimes people push back on me like, I thought your show was about mental health. I'm like, yeah, that's the entire game of entrepreneurship, it's all mental forever. And then you're like in this forever but I think that one of the really interesting parts about the personal development journey, is as you grow, you watch everything around you grow. And you got into it very young, which I think is absolutely phenomenal like, you had a child, I'm gonna call him a child 'cause he is still 17 and when you're 17 your child. I don't care what you say, you're stupid. But you had a kid, I was speaking at your mastermind and you have all these incredible entrepreneurs in there, paid a ton of money to be with you and there is this kid. 17 in the room. And bro, my first thought I was like, bro, if I was in that room when I was 17, yeah, that'd be a freaking billionaire right now. And so, my hope is like, here's what's interesting children are so open to receiving. You're the owner even at that age, at 18, 19, 20 and we have adults I know the average person listening to this show, about 40 years old. Right? I'm heading into my forties, I'm getting there. I've been on a personal development journey for 13 years. It's like, even still, man, I'm like bashing my head against the wall 'cause I'm like, you don't get this still, like, what we are missing the boat here. What do you think people need to do to really take advantage of personal development?

Jerome: They need to get rid of the negative people in their life. This is the hardest part for people, it was hard for me. I still battle with this sometimes, I talk about how good and how my mom was to be growing up and how she was my backbone. Then as I was an adult, my mom and dad also became a crutch, and my mom and dad are, I'm lucky to, to have my parents in their mid-seventies still healthy and I love them to death. God bless their hearts, but there's people in your life you have to rid of either long term or temporarily or certain aspects to get to where you need to get and you need to make sure that you're not selfish when you're doing it.

Michael: Let's go into that. How do you not be selfish while you do it?

Jerome: No, I'm sorry. You need to be selfish.

Michael: Yeah, I thought that might be where you were going. 'cause I was like, how do we navigate that?

Jerome: So, when you're going through this, you have to be selfish. And I've told people this when I'm training. I'm saying I'll tell 'em in front of a room. When I'm working with people, I know they're at this slot, I'll tell 'em, look, this time right now, ladies and gentlemen, it is time for you to be greedy and selfish because I was always taught that a drowning person can't save another drowning person. And so, if you're out in the middle of the ocean struggling to stay alive, you can't help nobody, you gotta help yourself first, you gotta get on dry land. And so if you're being affected emotionally by people that are around you, and you know what's hard is the biggest thing is it's the people you love, it is your parents a lot of times sometimes it's your spouse. You know, like entrepreneurship when you've already been married for a long time is hard sometimes, because you might be growing and your wife might not be vice versa, you know? And it's hard, you know, 'cause I don't tell anybody, well, you're growing at a different pace or some, you know, like that's the opposite what you want to do. And you may find that, that your spouse may never embrace your journey. So, one thing that, that I was blessed with was I was just a single man, no kids, taking on this journey. But one thing I was very adamant about when I met my wife was the direction I was going. And she, so much so that is, we grew together, she became a little bit bitter at a certain point in time in our relationship 'cause all relationships go through ups and downs. And as close as my wife and I feel that my wife and I are now, we've traveled a rollercoaster journey over the course of the last 25 years that her and I have been together and the last 16, almost 17 years that we've been married. And part of that was there was times where she was yum and I just told her the direction my life was gonna go and it was non-negotiable like I was non not negotiating the terms of the direction I wanted my life to go like I wanted. I was gonna be an entrepreneur. I was working that direction. By the time I met her, I was already doing well. I'd already ridden a little bit of a five-year roller coaster. And I wasn't willing to give that up and working out my one-hour workout, four days. In fact, those are two things I told her like, those are non-negotiable. My wife, like if I have to negotiate those, I'm less, I feel like I'm less of a man. And those are two factors in my life that I'm not willing to negotiate with. And there was a certain point in time where we had kids and she started losing her sense of identity because she gave up her professional career to be a mom, which was highly, I disrespect, and loved her for so much, but it was hard for her. And after the second baby, it was hard for her to get in the shape that she was in running eight miles a week before my son was born, you know, and living in this young woman's body, growing into a mom and she felt like she was losing her body, her sense of identity and knowing that, does my husband still love me for all of this? And we had a ride through some of this stuff and I never gave up, it compromised my goals and she was bitter about it certain once in time, but we worked through it together. And I had to work harder at being a better husband and I had to work harder at understanding why she was in need of, that I had to work harder at, and it took me years, like this didn't happen overnight. Like, I mean, you battle with it for like a few months, then you have a few months of good times where it doesn't come up. Then a circumstance your life happens where it makes them feel inferior again, or what you're doing is not the direction that you're going in together. And it's a constant growth and up and down rollercoaster ride and now I feel like I understand it better God, I hope so 25 years of doing it in 17 years of being together and I'm still not perfect. I still say dumb shit, you know? And there's still some times that we're not in alignment like even all this social media stuff, she caress less about this than she does my other stuff 'cause she doesn't understand it quite yet, you know?

And so, she supports me. I'm never given a reason not to, but we have to understand that, that those relationships are real and those people affect your life. So, when you're in your infant stages of change and growth and development, you need to be around people that truly support you and help you grow. And sometimes the people that help you grow in moments tear you down and in those moments you have to know what to shake off 'cause sometimes those people church more from those people than it does from sedentary individuals that are just out there in life. Right?

Michael: Yeah, a hundred percent and one of the things that came to mind for me is like, those relationships with the people of our lives are very difficult to navigate when you are driven. And I have experienced, I've had to learn the lesson the hard way. I mean, I've shared this on this show before, but I completely ruined a relationship 'cause I was overly focused on the goal of probably the woman I should have married. Right. I won't say maybe the, 'cause obviously I would've, you know, whatever. But my point is like, I got so zeroed in on money at 25 years old and everyone knows I lost all the money. Right. But if, maybe, if I would've been focused differently, things would've been different with that woman. And I remember probably four years ago I was like listening to Grant Cardone say something and I didn't really understand it until like I set, I processed it and I looked back on some of my relationships and some of my friendships, and he said the reason why he knew he was supposed to marry his wife is 'cause one day he told her, I'll give up anything for you except my dreams. And she said, I wouldn't expect anything less and what I realized in retrospect, looking at that woman that I was with in my twenties, it was, I will give up literally everything of all time ever to have. And not understanding that the dreams of being able to navigate that has to be so much more than just like money and success. And now when I think about my goals, which are like literally on the back of my foe, which I reap 17 times a day, which I write down twice a day every day. One of them is to be in a healthy, long sustaining relationship that I get to say I was in for 25 years. Right. And that to me is something that I move for but there is a f*cking, there is a caveat in this that me, that is everything. And so, I'm not gonna stop going for my dreams for this. And I think the right person in your life, the right people in your life will respect it. When I go and I look at like my friendships of my twenties, dude, those guys all doing the same shit we did, they're all drunk, they're all overweight. Look, may be clear I'm not shitting on them 'cause I love them, but what I'm saying is you look at my circle now, those people are not my circle and we're so tied to this idea that when we're changing, it's not okay to leave people behind. And I think it's the most important thing we can do.

Jerome: And I think that sometimes people think they're leaving him behind forever, I'll tell you.

Michael: I agree. I don't think it's right.

Jerome: Like I got a good friend of mine that I hold close to my heart, and I don't hang out with him on a regular basis. I'll see him maybe, maybe once a year. And when we get together, we laugh, man, we tell stories and it's a good time. But I know that I can't hang out with him every day because the lifestyle that he lives and the lifestyle that I live are entirely different, they'll either be some level of resentment that he has towards me because maybe he might feel inferior to what I've been able to accomplish because he's looking at it a monetary, on a financial basis. And to me that holds almost zero relevance and he's a good dad, a good husband, he's not standing stood in his own two feet. But people get resentful of that. In the opposite, he drinks a lot and he doesn't really fit my lifestyle right. And as much as I love him, I just don't wanna be around the alcohol and it just doesn't fit the direction that I want my kids to see. It doesn't fit the direction and the example of that portion of being a father that I want to depict on my kids. And I just don't want that to be a depiction in my life as well, because you slowly start succumbing your life to the people you're around. So if I'm around him more regularly, I probably will end up drinking.

Michael: So, I have a question that I feel like is gonna help a lot of people. You grew up having some resentment about dyslexia, being mad at people, obviously facing some competence issues, having a teacher come into your life who plays this really important role, feeling like you want to prove it to not only them, but to you, and then you find this path of success. What I'm wondering about in that, because this is what I think is so incredible about your journey, is success isn't, you just said it it's not money. What is success like mean to you today?

Jerome: Oh bro, you're gonna make me cry. Yeah. Success to me, it has everything to do with everything. I mean, money makes your life easier, but success to me is about famine and my faith, you know, who you are as a person in all aspects. Success to me is how my wife thinks of me. When I say what other people think of you, it's not what they think of me monetarily, but people think of me, what I represent. Like when someone says my name does, is it dominantly that bad things or is it dominantly good things? Like, did I make an impact being here? You know, but my family for sure over everything is success to me.

But success also falls in with yourself, right? Because like I know that I can't be the father, that I want to be the boss. I want to be the husband I wanna be first I'm not happy with me. And so, there's like levels to this because success is like, okay, how well have you take care of yourself? Like, are you watching your weight? Are you watching like what you eat? Are you watching what you put in your body? Do you smoke? Do you drink? How are you treating yourself? You know, are you not sleepy? So, because I hear entrepreneurs talk about this, like, oh, I'm not gonna get rest, I'm up at 4:00 AM this is what I do. And if I wouldn't sleep if I didn't have to and I only sleep, you know, say all this stuff that's, I think is total bullshit. In regards to that, because like, man, if you don't have health, how do you sustain everything else around you? So it starts with your core, right? Like success to me is like, okay, it starts here at this core that I live in, called My Body. And then you were talking about the spirit earlier and it was funny because the sermon this Sunday was about thanking God for, not for the stuff in life, but our spirits that we live in. And I always get like, one thing, that's why I tell my kids like, like, to me, it's like the recharge once a week, like cut a recharge. And you talked about praying to your spirit, like being thankful about your spirit. And you and Cole were talking about this, but one of the things to me is we gotta start with our core verse, you gotta be happy with who you are. Then I could be a better father and if I'm a successful person in every way that I can be that I could be a better husband, I could be a better dad. I can be a better boss. I can be better to business partners. I can be better in every aspect of my life. So, that to me is true success and there's a lot of balance in moving pieces in that and it's ongoing. We're never gonna be successful a hundred percent to our satisfaction every day if you're really driving towards that. But the more we work at that, that success and that's ongoing forever.

Michael: What are your thoughts about when you hear people say things along the lines of, well, that's for you, that's for them, I'm never gonna have it. I don't deserve it. You know, it's impossible, look where I came from. What are your thoughts about that?

Jerome: You need to change their mindset; they need to shift it. I'll tell this story because I think this has to do with exactly what you're talking about.

I remember studying in college and I was sitting at a little cafe diner, and it's a stupid little cafe diner that the food items aren't expensive. But I remember being so broke and my parents didn't give us money, you know, they gave us an education, their philosophy was, we give you a platform, then you go from there, they didn't buy us cars, they do that stuff for us, they expected us to go out and do. And I remember being in this Cafe Diner, my cousin and I we're both raised, well, I'm not close from a really big family of 11 kids and our moms were sisters and they grew up in the same fashion, you know, and you go bet for yourself. And remember looking up at that, at the menu board and I remember looking up the, I tell my cousin Road one day we'll be able to afford anything on that menu. And it was a little diner and everything was about, was like 89 separate burritos and $2 and 50 set plates, $5 plates and we couldn't afford it. You know, and you know, you come from that and you build towards something bigger. And I apologize, I forgot the question 'cause I got caught on this story, but it has to do with the direction we're going.

Michael: People are get stuck in the limited mindset.

Jerome: So, when you get stuck in that, like, I could have stayed there and here's what it was, is that, I knew I deserved more and my parents would tell me all the time. They'd say, Jerome, those restaurants and it's funny, I got my parents a gift certificate to Ruth Chris Restaurant just two years ago. My parents come from predominantly Hispanic family, they were Spanish speaking, you know, from the time they were young, they didn't learn English till they were in school they got discriminated against it when they were growing up. So, they didn't teach us Spanish as a result and they didn't want us to go through that. And so, they landed up becoming resentful towards those who discriminated against 'em, right? Rightfully so right to a certain degree. I wouldn't say rightfully so, but it happens. So anyways, they do in that fashion where there was a little bit of back discrimination towards the white man because they said they wouldn't tell us, they would go, those that isn't for people like us, that's for those types of and so much so that they still are like that today. Like I got 'em a gift certificate and it's Ruth Kris Restaurant for God's sakes, but they got there. I said, Hey, how's dinner? You know, a couple weeks later when I saw 'em, they'd go, and they go, well, you know, my dad was like, oh, there's all those fancy people, those fancy rich people in there, you know, they still to this day don't believe that they're worthy enough to go to sit down, you know, Ruth, Chris to sit down, have a dinner.

So, we were raised like that and you know, what drove me? You know, what really drove me is I sat back and I go, I'm taught a one end going to Catholic school that we're all born equal. God made us all equal, but yet I'm being told by my parents that they're like the better things in life that I think like the better foods, the better trout aren't for people like us, is for people like them, and yet they're resentful to those same people. Why? And so, I wanted to prove to myself that if we were truly born equal, why is it that I can't have the better things in life? Why can't I go have a wide beef steak or a sushi dinner or whatever it was at that point in time. Why was that for the white man that I was taught, that I feel like I was born equal. If I was truly born equal, then I should be able to get it, that drove me.

Michael: Yeah, I resonate with that so much, man. Like that's what drove me to that first million bucks. I mean, obviously I lost it all 'cause I got all the thing because I had the, the car and I had the closet, and I have the shoes and the $500 dinner. You gotta think this is 20 years August, right? So, like I'm 21. So I'm like 21 and I'm eating $300 dinners a couple times a week, that's like a thousand dollars dinners today. I was like, yeah, I proved it to everybody. But the problem was I just didn't have clarity about it. I didn't have clarity about like, why do I want this? And what I've come to realize now, and to me, I agree with you I don't think success is money, but money is a really beautiful thing that will allow you to take care of your health, take care of your family, take care of your people. And you know, I took my brothers and my ex-partner to Tony Robbins that was a five-figure event outta my pot. I spent everything for that 'cause I wanted to expose them to that other side. And I think sometimes you just need to get exposed to a little bit, right? And this journey, this healing process, this thing with thinking broken, everything that we're trying to do is just exposing people because we grow up and people go, I can't have self-love and worth and I go, yes, you can.

Jerome: You can. And you know, don't you feel sometimes that bad exposure is also dangerous to them sometimes? And let me explain why, just let me know if you've experienced this. You know, we're our own biggest demons I feel like we ourselves hold ourselves back it doesn't have to do with anything more than our own in inadequacies and the syndromes that come along with that.

You know, one of the big things is we we're so hard on ourselves. We hinder our own ability to succeed time and time again. One of the big things is when you expose somebody to entrepreneurship or self-healing, they have to admit that they're so wrong with them. And most people aren't willing to admit that there's something wrong with them, that's a big problem because they're in denial. It's just like an addict or anybody else. So much so that, I remember when I was 21 years old, I was living in Virginia. One of my closest friends I was I was trying to get him to go in the same direction I was, and his mom called me and said, stop literally called me in my office in Virginia. And she goes, you need to stop giving my son those books. And I said, what books? He was Stink and Grow Rich. How do with friends and influence people? Insane in his book. And Jack Go, I go, are you kidding me? I'm not feeding your son drugs. I'm giving him success books to make it better. Goes well, do you know that it's okay for them to be have normal jobs? Like what you're doing isn't for everybody? And I said, I get that, but I'm trying to make him, you know, he's my best friend, I'm trying to make him better. And she was resentful to me for trying to make her son better because she wanted to make sure that her son understood that it was okay to be average, it was okay to be normal, that there was nothing wrong with him. That my direction was the wrong direction and that his direct, her direction was the right direction as a mom. And I think that there's some, a lot of resentment from people 'cause they have to truly admit to themselves that what a little piece of them is broken. And most people are not willing to admit fact that there is a portion of them that's broken from their upbringing and they're in denial.

Michael: And that's a hard truth, you know, you hear that. And I think to myself, she probably would've preferred you were giving him drugs because I think the most dangerous thing someone can have is an open mind to possibility.

Jerome: Yeah, I think so. 'cause then they open a door to failure.

Michael: That's right. And that's so scary, it's scary, dude. I mean, I'm telling, you know what's funny, man? I was thinking about this. I always get nervous before I speak. You know, it doesn't matter. I've spoken in front of 10,000 people. I've spoken in front of two. I text you before I came to speak at your mastermind. I'm like, I'm in the hallway, like gathering my thoughts 'cause I get super nervous. Right? You would never know like people see me up there and they're like, this dude's in Nashville, whatever. But what they don't see is like, I put this idea in my head like, one day I could do this. And I just started doing, but the failures were massive in the beginning. And I was just like, okay, cool. I'm gonna learn from this. Oh, I made a mistake there. Okay cool. When I said this, maybe I should have did that 'cause that's where I get the laugh. Over here is where I get the tears over here is, and it was just like I took those failures and I built on them and my hope is that people will just start building on the failures because I think failure's a great foundation because you're only going up from there.

Jerome: Yeah. Well, and I did that, I spoke in front of a group one time and I talked about that. I said, let ask you guys a question. If I put up a thought right now and you could try anything in life, and nobody around you knew and could see anything that you were doing, you had the endless ability to fail and fail, and fail, and fail, and nobody was gonna judge you. Would you try more? Would you do more? Would you go after things more knowing that you weren't gonna be condemned? Because it isn't their fear of failing that is the true fear. It's the fear of judgment that is the true fear. And almost a hundred percent of that said absolutely, I would do it. And I said, when you become that confident in yourself is when you'll succeed.

Michael: That's right. The hardest part about what you just said is everyone is always gonna say yes to that question and 2% of people will ever actually take the step.

Jerome: And that's why there's a stats and I'd say, you know, that's what you say at 3% of the 3% of the population controls 95% of the wealth of the world. And the other 5% is shared by 97% of the population, and it's because of that statistic right there. We're not gonna change that statistic unfortunately, but we can change the lives of one or two or three people here and there. Hopefully we find a mic, hopefully we find a drone, hopefully find a call, we find that one person that is listening to this and we impact out one person's life and we've done our job, bro.

Michael: Yeah, that's exactly right. Man, thank you so much for being here. This has just been an awesome, awesome, conversation your vulnerability and your authenticity. I love you, dude. It's absolutely incredible. Before I ask you my last question, where can everyone find you?

Jerome: Jerome Maldonado. You can find me on every social media platform under Jerome Maldonado on IG. It's the Jerome Maldonado, but I'm real easy to find. You can Google me online and my websites are Jerome Maldonado.

Michael: Amazing. Yeah, it'll be everywhere at thinkunbrokenpodcast.com. My last question for you, my friend, what does it mean to you to be unbroken?

Jerome: Oh, you know, I was thinking about that when you asked Cole a second ago, and I want it to be more organic, so I kind of just exited outta my mind. Unbroken is, has to do with your life spirit to me, like you can't be broken down by life circumstances because I think at moments, we all feel broken down. We have moments that we all feel, a little beat up, media tired or hungry or whatever it is. Life just has a way to beat us up. Being unbroken is when you have all your pieces in life put together. For me, my kids, my family, business, my faith, my health, everything's in alignment but it's not just when that stuff's in alignment it's when things go bad, when you have so much control over your life that nobody and no life circumstance can take, can break you down and subject you to anything more than what you are right now. And so to me, being unbroken is having the innate ability to be strong enough to have a direction that follows your true life where you ultimately wanna be. And for me, it just has to do really with family and freedom.

Michael: Brilliant said that, friend. Thank you so much for being here. Unbroken Nation. Thank you for listening. Please like, subscribe, comment, share, tell a friend. And remember that when you do, you're helping other people transform trauma to triumph, breakdowns to breakthroughs, and others just like you, to become a hero of their own story.

And Until Next Time.

My Friends, Be Unbroken.

I'll See Ya.